Agent 47 Brutally Slaughters Nuns In The Bizarre Hitman: Absolution E3 Trailer

There are so many things wrong with this "Attack of the Saints" trailer for Hitman: Absolution, starting with the fact that the Saints don't so much attack as they walk forward in slow motion as Agent 47 takes them out one-by-one.

It seems silly to me that Square Enix decided to play up the fetish nun angle in yesterday's teaser image, only to have Agent 47 viciously take them all out in today's trailer. I'm going to assume there's more to these fish-netted fanatics than seven women in tattered goth gear having their blood spilled all over a seedy motel parking lot.

And did you catch the bit in the motel room where they show the Band-Aid covering 47's barcode? Looks like he tried to remove it himself, though anyone that's ever worked a cash register knows that tiny bit peeking out at the top is enough to find out how much a reforming hired killer runs these days.

So what's the message here? What's the point?

If you're going after one of the world's deadliest men, skip the synchronised walking and go straight to blowing up the building. Just because you call yourselves the Saints doesn't mean you can't fire until you're in a row. Choreography kills.


    What have they done to my dear hitman?

    There is so much wrong here.

    I think the phrase "...... the fuck?" accompanied by a mildly confused facial expression would be appropriate here.

    Though noticing that nun with the flip down arm blades, am I the only one reminded slightly of Bloodrayne?

    actively goes into a 4 way gunfight/punch the people making this even understand what hitman is about?

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    IF you notice the tattoos on one of the girls arms. It is (I think) of 47s old agency which turned on him @ the end of the last game if I am not mistaken.

    Getup aside, would it not be safe to assume that 47 is now a rogue agent that has to contend with former partners / operatives of his old organisation as well as murdering mostly evil people?

    Would've been better if it was the same concept but instead of RPG to the room, it's nuns scattering around the motel trying to find him. Cut to one nun asking the motel owner if he's seen "a bald man in need of some 'saving'", she says as she shows a bit of her assets. Cut to the other nuns as they get taken out one by one by 47. Rinse and repeat until all of them are dead. 47 walks past the owner who asks if he's accepted Jesus as his lord and savior, and 47 replies, "I'm an Atheist." and drives away.

    Cut to black.

      That was terrible.

        it sure was, they blew-up a motel room. how dare they

        it sure was, they blew-up a motel room:(

          47 will probably get a bill for the entire contents of the mini-bar, too.

    If you watch the trailer closely, Agent 47 only really killed 4 of the 8 Saints/nuns...

    "The original assassin"
    I can't help but feel that's a dig at Ubisoft.

    "Just because you call yourselves the Saints doesn’t mean you can’t fire until you’re in a row."
    I think I see what you did there...?

    So apparently every series I loved 10 years ago is going to be given a cover system and have its' soul morphed into something very 'different'... and they're all going to be come successful with a generation of kids who will say the 'old ones suck'...

    So this is what it's like to be an old person. :-P


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