Dear Diary, after mum kicked me out of the house because of my radical views on the role of Pokémon in our society, I didn't know what I was going to do with my life.
Everything in our world seems to rely on Pokémon slave labour -- from construction work to farming! Heck, even photography seems to be built around tormenting Pokémon by throwing things at them! But I finally found a place that might take me: the renowned Pokémon Art Academy.
Of course, there is just one small problem: I can't even draw a stick figure much less a Pokémon.
This morning I arrived at the Academy for my meeting with the headmaster. It was to be my final test before admission. But as I approached the steps to the main building, I met a girl. Like me, the girl, Lilly, was looking to join the Academy and would be joining me in the interview. My heart instantly filled with dread -- there was no way she was as inept as me. I was doomed.
We went together to meet the headmaster who took a while to talk about the Academy's long tradition of training excellent Pokémon illustrators. Afterward he gave me my school ID card and for the briefest moment, my heart swelled. But then he dropped the bombshell. Before we officially became students, we'd have to take a test -- a drawing test.
My hands trembled as he laid out the test. We had to draw one of three Pokémon: Pikachu, Froakie, or Piplup. Well, as I am only really familiar with the first 150 discovered Pokémon, there was only one real choice, Pikachu, so I got started.
For a "test" the headmaster was surprisingly helpful. He gave me some lines to trace and explained how to use basic pastel crayons.
In the end, my picture looked like a simplified version of the headmaster's own. I was actually rather pleased. Lilly's, on the other hand, was an abomination, pure and simple. Even though I felt bad for her, I couldn't help feeling relieved that the one person in the world worse than me at fine arts was also in this interview. But the headmaster was more lenient than I expected and welcomed us both. Thus, Lilly and I had permission to start the beginner's course.
In our first class of the day, we had to draw an Oshawott. In truth, this was easier than Pikachu when it came down to it. However, this time I had to use more tools than just pastels. I learned about how to ink a drawing and use different layers -- i.e., one for the colouring and another for the line art. And honestly, though simple, it looked pretty darn good. Maybe this art academy is the place for me after all.
Lilly's picture, again, was just horrible. Poor girl.
Our second and last class of the day had us drawing a Fennekin. Instead of a straight-on view, it was a three-quarters view -- and far harder than anything I've ever had to draw before. This time, we learned about the importance of pencil thickness in making the lines of your art and about using different shades of colour. It took me a good 20 minutes to complete, but in the end, I can say without hyperbole, that it was the best thing I have ever drawn.
However, credit to where it is due: Lilly's was even better. I mean her Fennekin has fire quite literally exploding out of its ears! How could I ever hope to top that!?
Welp, it's time for bed. Tomorrow is another big day at the Pokémon Art Academy. Do I have what it takes to be a "Pokémon Art Master"? We'll just have to wait and see.
Pokémon Art Academy was released in Japan for the Nintendo 3DS on June 19, 2014. It will be released in Europe on 4 July 2014; Australia and New Zealand on 5 July 2014; and in North America sometime this October.