The school yard can be tough, especially when your teachers are trying to kill you.
Welcome to Kindergarten, a brutal puzzle adventure game where you play the same day over until you get it right. And boy are there a lot of ways to get it wrong.
You take on the role of a kindergarten student who is trying to find a missing classmate, figure out why the janitor in constantly mopping up blood and be an A+ boyfriend to the school’s queen bitch.
It’s all rather reminiscent of Nightmare Cafeteria from The Simpsons Treehouse of Horror V.
As you progress through the game, new hints will unlock to help you complete the quests given to you by the different characters and obtain items you might need later on.
The dialogue options, items you buy and actions will all impact on the outcome of your day. Each fresh day is split into 5 phases: before school, class, lunch time, play time and show and tell. The challenge really comes in the form of the amount of moves you have for each phase, which are represented by apples that you use to complete tasks.
For example, it might cost you one apple to bait the school bully into beating you up by bringing up his alcoholic father.
Once you’ve used all your apples up, you move onto the next phase. If you find you have excess apples left, you can trade them in for cold, hard cash. Stock up, the playground black market is a surprisingly expensive place.
Seeing as the game is roughly 4 -5 hours long, you’re going to find yourself doing the same stuff a fair bit. As a puzzler it’s an interesting concept but it can get frustrating to run through the same dialogue lines multiple times, even though they are considerably dark and hilarious.
Just take this example of when you ‘play house’.
[clear]
So wrong.
Kindergarten left Steam early access in mid-June and is rolling in ‘overwhelmingly positive’ reviews. If you like fun puzzlers and have a sick sense of humour, then you might enjoy it for $US4.99. You can buy it here.
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