So you’ve been browsing Twitter like the little content sponge you are, and you’ve used up your rate limit because you refuse to pay to be verified – now what? Touch grass? Contact loved ones? Of course not: the next logical step is to turn to video games, and we’ve got some great suggestions for games to play when the blue bird app tells you it’s time to take a break.
The Sims 4
If you yourself can’t perma-scroll your Twitter newsfeed, just make a Sim that looks just like you do it! The Sims 4 is a classic time-sink and perfect for when you’re in the mood to aimlessly do something in front of a screen but can’t quite work out what. The base game is free-to-play, but if you’d like to try your hand at becoming a social media influencer, the City Living expansion is currently 50% off in the Steam Summer Sale.
DAVE THE DIVER
Currently one of Steam’s top sellers (outselling Elden Ring and only just beaten out by BattleBit Remastered and CS:GO), DAVE THE DIVER is a deep sea exploration RPG (relive the OceanGate Twitter trend from the old days (two weeks ago)) and restaurant management game. Go fishing, explore the ‘Blue Hole’ and the depths of the ocean, and then cook up top-quality sushi for your discerning customers. It’s full of mini-games and has a great art style, and based on reviews has plenty of players – over 16k since its June 28th release – hooked.
Story of Seasons: A Wonderful Life
Maybe being told by Elon Musk that you can’t look at your little posts on Twitter has you feeling a touch frustrated – take some time to chill with Story of Seasons: A Wonderful Life. Stardew Valley stans will absolutely love this farming sim remake of the Harvest Moon classic where you can grow crops, care for barnyard animals, find love and raise a family. It’s exactly the casual, relaxing type of gameplay that pairs nicely with a rage-inducing evening of getting the adult version of a parental lockout from a social media platform. It’s also available on Nintendo Switch (as well as other consoles) if you’d like the full ‘curled up on the couch or in bed while looking at a screen’ Twitter experience still.
Brotato
Action roguelike Brotato was released less than two weeks ago, but already over 38,000 players have left overwhelmingly positive reviews. The top-down arena shooter looks as chaotic as you’d expect from a game where you play a potato that can wield up to six weapons at once while fighting off alien hordes. It’s currently on sale for $6 as part of the Steam Summer Sales, but even with a full price of $7.50 it comes in at less than one month of Twitter Blue.
The Stanley Parable: Ultra Deluxe
Described as an “expanded reimagining” of the 2013 Stanley Parable, this first-person exploration game is seemingly neverending, a little confusing, and one user described it as “like having sex but with a keyboard and a mouse.” Kind of all ways I’d describe using Twitter, funnily enough. The game presents multiple endings where choices matter as Stanley tries to work out where all his coworkers went in an unending but simultaneously finite story, masterfully narrated by Kevan Brighting.
If none of these games tickle your fancy, there’s plenty more where that came from. Or alternatively, you could just…do something else until your Twitter rate limit resets. I’m not your mum, do what you want.
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