For the past few days, a Nintendo Switch game has started to gain notoriety as the worst release on the platform. Any time people post about this game online, they warn others not to buy it. So I picked it up.
Troll and I is a port of a game for Playstation 4, Xbox One and PC from this past March. It’s an adventure game about a young man and his troll friend somewhere in Scandinavia. Despite having been released for the Switch yesterday, it only recently became available in the Nintendo eShop, so I had to actually venture out into the world to grab a physical copy.
My first impulse was to reserve one at GameStop, but they didn’t have any, so I went online and reserved one at my local Best Buy. This morning I dodged and weaved through Union Square’s farmer’s market to pick it up at Best Buy. Shout outs to Giselle, the employee manning the store pick up counter, for not making me actually say the name of the game I was buying.
After handing over $US30, Troll and I was mine. It is the only Switch cartridge I own.
One of the first things you’ll see when you boot up is the front page of a newspaper announcing the death of Joseph Stalin. Someone offers another character, Nico, a three million dollar bounty to capture a live troll.
I was actually kinda into this offbeat premise, but far too quickly the game leaves the Stalin’s death and the troll bounty hunter behind. The game then transitions to somewhere in a Scandinavian forest, where our main character, Otto, resides. He’s off to hunt some boars for his mum. Guess how long she lives?
In Troll and I, you’ll doing a bunch of quick time events to escape danger, climb a lot of ledges and cliff faces, hunt some animals, craft some weapons, and solve some platforming puzzles. It basically feels like it wants to be the Tomb Raider reboot, but also there’s a troll who comes to save you from danger. Otto and the troll quickly become friends — like disturbingly quickly.
This kid goes from not knowing trolls exist to being buddies with a troll overnight. You can ride the troll, and also play as the troll, and it’s exciting because at the very least it’s not another platforming puzzle.
There’s no real polish or finesse in this game. You don’t lock on enemies, but rather kinda swing your weapon around until everything dies, or you die because of the horrible camera. See below, where briefly the game positioned the camera inside of an enemy troll:
The platforming puzzles are pretty easy, except when the game’s controls make them impossible. To jump off ledges, you’re supposed to hold L to sprint, then just run at a ledge. This works until it just, for no reason, doesn’t. After successfully jumping off three platforms, I ran at a ledge ten times only for the game to assume I wanted to hang off it.
Let me jump, Troll and I. Let me fucking jump, OK?
On top of all that, Troll and I is ugly. This game looks like the last hold out from the era where every game was rendered in shades of brown. The grass is dull, the sky hardly blue, the shadows are very pixelated, even the time I accidentally burned to death wasn’t very striking.
If the game is striving for realism, the muddy textures and lighting don’t cut it, and it if wants to be lighthearted and cartoony, well, look at this terrifying troll:
There are some hidden gems on the Switch, like Shephy or Implosion: Never Lose Hope. Do not mistake Troll and I for one of those. It has completely earned its notoriety.
Please, don’t make my mistake. If you see Troll and I at the Best Buy, just turn away. It’s clunky, trite, not bizarre enough to make up for its shortcomings, and yes, it is absolutely the worst release on the Switch right now.
Comments
26 responses to “The Nintendo Switch Game Fans Are Warning People Not To Buy”
Sounds heavily influenced by the Norweigan movie Trollhunter.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1740707/
Good movie. Found footage style. Worth the watch. Think its on Stan.
I tried to watch that on Netflix one night but the subtitles were borked out a the time 🙁 Think it’s gone now.
So is this worse than than Vroom in the sky game?
+1 for Troll Hunter. Definitely an interesting movie
Bought it at Cash Converters two weeks ago for $6. Just realised this week that it had the wrong disc in the case. 🙁
I don’t blame what the fans say about Troll and I. I just don’t think it’s a good game at all and since Nintendo is already working with Maximum Games I’d say Maximum Games needs to give us a different Switch game Maximum Games really needs to make another Nintendo Switch game because Troll and I may not be a good game I just think Maximum Games needs to change the way we play video games forever because for a moment I thought they said Troll and I was astounding but now they say it’s a complete disaster which involves struggling to survive in the Scandinavian forest with both Otto and the trollso I would say do not go out and buy Troll and I I think it’s time that Maximum Games gave us a different Switch game.
What did I just read here?
Something about Maximum Games
Worst game on the switch? Can’t be hard when there is like three games for it.
A troll post on a troll themed article. How apt.
I’ll feed you little troll. Here are the current release for the Switch in PAL territories. 70+ to date.
Sonic Mania
Troll and I
Ironcast
Phantom Trigger
Rocket Fist
Severed
Gunbarich for Nintendo Switch
Puzzle Adventure Blockle
Retro City Rampage DX
Slime-san
Strikers 1945 for Nintendo Switch
Use Your Words
The Mummy Demastered
Infinite Minigolf
Namco Museum
Ultra Hyperball
Overcooked! Special Edition
Physical Contact: Speed
Qbics Paint
Fate/Extella: The Umbral Star
Splatoon 2
Boost Beast
Cave Story+
Cars 3: Driven to Win
Bulb Boy
De Mambo
Death Squared
Levels+: Addictive Puzzle Game
Flip Wars
I and Me
Implosion – Never Lose Hope
Shephy
Vaccine
GoNNER
Oceanhorn: Monster of Uncharted Seas
Arms
Mighty Gunvolt Burst
Shantae: Half-Genie Hero
Astro Duel Deluxe
Disgaea 5 Complete
Ultra Street Fighter II: The Final Challengers
Thumper
Minecraft: Nintendo Switch Edition
Dark Witch Music Episode: Rudymical
NBA Playgrounds
TumbleSeed
Mario Kart 8 Deluxe
Puyo Puyo Tetris
Kamiko
Wonder Boy: The Dragon’s Trap
The Jackbox Party Pack 3
Mr. Shifty
Lego City Undercover
Graceful Explosion Machine
Has-Been Heroes
Snake Pass
Human Resource Machine
Little Inferno
World of Goo
Blaster Master Zero
1-2-Switch
Fast RMX
I Am Setsuna
Just Dance 2017
The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild
New Frontier Days: Founding Pioneers
Othello
Shovel Knight: Specter of Torment
Shovel Knight: Treasure Trove
Skylanders: Imaginators
Snipperclips
Super Bomberman R
Voez
Vroom in the Night Sky
But how many are actual Switch games and not just something that can be had elsewhere already.
I mean World of Goo has been kicking around for roughly forever and a half, it’s hardly much of an addition to the library.
Calling this in question is irrelevant as the poster posited simply that there were “no games” in the console. The response was adequate in proving that statement ridiculous.
How many of those are actually good? Adequate even? And how many are ports of games which are years old?
Nintendo are desperately padding the switch’s library with ‘whatever’ and they are fooling no one.
After a quick scan of those titles:
– a whole shed load of low budget gimmick titles, just like the Wii had.
– a couple of Nintendo developed titles (the only reason for buying the console)
– numerous ports which are available on multiple consoles, many of which are years old (disgea, ocean horn, street fighter etc).
It doesn’t matter how many games the system has if 95% of said games are underwhelming or shit.
Would LOVE to play Zelda. Not buying a console for it. I’m not alone in thinking this way.
-Gimmick titles: Just because you don’t like them, it doesn’t mean that they are bad. They have an audience, which made the Wii the winning console of its generation.
-There are more than “a couple” of Nintendo developed titles.
-There are less than 100 titles, BoftW is the videogame best critically reviewed in history, and there are other well-praised games in there. The amount of “shit” is nowhere near 95%.
-Take a look at the games released in the first 6 months of Sony or Microsoft consoles. You won’t find many more in number, nor a much lower percentage of ports/shovelware, etc. You may find a slightly higher percentage of AAA games, but they are, invariably, the 1293th version of a shooter or sports game.
-You are certainly not alone, but in the minority. The Switch has been an undeniable commercial success.
Oh look. Someone learnt how to copy paste. You need to learn what a joke is and not act like a raging fanboy. Take off the fedora.
“It was a joke, you [string of epithets]”
-Every single troll’s first and favourite response when being called out.
Why do you Nintendo fans get so salty when some says something negative about Nintendo console. You act like we have insulted your first born child. Get over yourself buddy. Remove your head from your rectum.
Show us on the doll where the bad Nintendo touched you
God those graphics are awful.
…and the reality of what the Switch is starts to descend on us all. This thing is limited in power, limited in storage, has some silly design faults, primitive online capabilities, and its screen is easily scratched and not friendly in sunlight. But worse of all is the library – nothing but gimmick laden games, re-releases, gimped ports, and a collection of mobile phone like games all at stupidly high (blatantly rip-off) prices… Nintendo management should be fired as they have somehow thrown away a once amazing company.
Agree. The whole thing is a clusterfuck.
Why can’t they just release a normal console without stupid gimmicks, with normal controllers, and great Nintendo games which don’t get drip fed to consumers at a snails pace?
Is that really so hard? Ffs..
hate to burst your bubble, but the system’s power has nothing to do with this crap game. This game is still crap even on the more powerful Xbox One or PS4.
Amazing your train of thought because this system is selling like hotcakes. Don’t be jealous. You don’t like it, fine. I don’t like horseradish sauce. But that doesn’t mean I vilify Heinz because they sell a jar of it.
It’s selling like hot cakes only because it’s a trendy brand which has rabid fanboys. Exactly the same as Apple. It wouldn’t matter what features or games are available it would still sell like hot cakes.
Your Heinz analogy makes no sense.
Obviously Troll & I doesn’t quite count since its been released elsewhere, however the eShop at the moment is mostly kinda sketchy ports of Android games. :(.
These comparatively rare negative articles about the Switch or one of its games are like ambrosia descending from the Heavens on a parched Earth for our resident Nintendo haters. Once again and for a little while, they can pretend that the Switch is a piece of shit, Nintendo are incompetent morons, their customer base are rabid fanboys and their bitter hatred is vindicated.
A wild Nintendo white knight has arrived!
Haha, I actually got a tattoo inspired by this game xD I really liked the design, the game itself is awful though xD