Certified PC gamers tend to think they are the best of the pack, but our superior hardware comes at a price. Sure, part of that is the hundreds of dollars of upfront cost which can sometimes make console gaming look simpler and more appealing , but mostly I’m talking about how the community treats PC gamers like elitists. What, just because our games run better than yours?
To make amends with gamers at large, I’ve devised a list of things you should never say to the PC community, so we can all learn to get along.
Please know that this is all in good fun; all hardware is valid.
“I bought my PC prebuilt!”
If you say this to a PC gamer, you will absolutely hear about how much time and money you could have saved by just building the damn thing yourself.
“There are no differences between a console game and a PC game.”
Between lower game price points, better graphics options, more robust mod support, just to name a few things, this is simply not true.
“I can’t even see what difference 60 FPS or 4K resolution make.”
This is the entire reason people build PCs in the first place. I need to make my game look the best before I can start having fun.
“I’ll just wait for the Switch version”
My brother in christ, have you heard of Steam or the Steam deck? What if you didn’t have to wait years for a port of the most interesting games around?
“I use a controller instead of a keyboard and mouse.”
OK, auto-aim. You don’t want to pull this out in your Overwatch 2 or Call of Duty match. It’ll bring out some bad characters.
“Any keyboard is fine, to be honest”
The second top reason anyone builds a computer: to eventually get into mechanical keyboards. And let me tell you, the clickety-clack of every switch you can pick makes a huge difference, even if it’s only in how loud my typing will sound.
“How many launchers do you use?”
There’s only Steam, Xbox Game Pass, GOG Galaxy, Epic Games Store, Battle.net, Origin, the Rockstar Games Launcher, the Windows Store, Riot Client, UPlay, the Bethesda Launcher, Itchio…hmm, maybe console games have the right idea after all.
“Let’s play a couch co-op game together!”
Most likely, the answer will just be no, since local multiplayer isn’t as common around these parts, so you’re better off just not asking. Plus, how am I supposed to sit in my gamer chair that’s designed to look like a race car while using my top of the line mouse if we’re in front of a TV?
“Can I play this game on a Mac?”
Can I Google that for you, you filthy Macbook user?*
*Except you, Whoopi Goldberg. We love you.
“PC ports suck.”
The truth is the truth, but it’s not nice to say it. Lately, it’s more common for a triple-A game to release in a somewhat broken state on PC than it is for things to just work.
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