WIN! Two Copies Of Mass Effect 2 On Xbox 360

WIN! Two Copies Of Mass Effect 2 On Xbox 360

WIN! Two Copies Of Mass Effect 2 On Xbox 360Commander Shepard’s space opera continues on January 28 when Mass Effect 2 launches on Xbox 360 and PC. You’ll have ten chances to win a copy over the next week. Here’s how.

UPDATE: Friday’s draw is now closed.

We’ve got ten copies of Mass Effect 2 to give away. Specifically:

* 2 x Mass Effect 2 Collectors Edition (Xbox 360) * 5 x Mass Effect 2 (Xbox 360) * 1 x Mass Effect 2 Collectors Edition (PC) * 2 x Mass Effect 2 (PC)

WIN! Two Copies Of Mass Effect 2 On Xbox 360Between now and Tuesday I’ll be offering up one or more of these to win each day. Today we have two copies on Xbox 360. It may not be the Collectors Edition, but you’ve got twice the chance to win.

In Mass Effect 2, Shepard recruits a squad of the galaxy’s most elite soldiers and assassins to undertake the most dangerous mission of all. To win a copy of Mass Effect 2, we want to know which six people (real, fictional or possibly not even people – we’ll be flexible here) you would recruit to join you on the most dangerous mission of all. Tell us which six people you’d pick and why they’re right for the job.

Leave your entry in the comments below. Multiple entries will be discarded and only your first entry will count. You have until midnight tonight to enter. The winners will be announced tomorrow and stay tuned for a new draw over the weekend.

Good luck!

Oh, and congratulations to Steven Bogos and Adam Grabda for winning yesterday’s PC draw. They both took the unconventional route and it paid off. Here’s their deadly squads of six…

Steven Bogos: 1: An Action hero 2: An Internet Meme 3: A Sci-Fi reference 4: A Video Game Character 5: A Historical Figure 6: A personal friend

Adam Grabda: 1. Wii Fit 2. Wii Sports Resort 3. Wii Play 4. Mario Kart 5. New Super Mario Bros. 6. Wii Fit Plus

[Terms and Conditions]


  • 1: Clint Eastwood, in his prime. Gun slinger.

    2: Doc, and his Delorean

    3: Einstein (Doc’s dog, not the scientist)

    4: The Joker, he’d lighten the mood of saving the galaxy

    5: Cortana, she could keep us updated by tapping into the enemies com-links

    6: Me. ‘Cause I’m just that awesome.

  • 1. Book from Firefly. He always has wise words, and isn’t bad with a gun, when it comes to it.

    2. Little-Bo-Peep. Cool in a crisis, doesn’t go running off crazy just because her sheep have gone missing, just lets them come back when they’re ready. Clearly won’t pull too many mobs accidentally.

    3. Rin Tin Tin. That dog can rescue anyone from anywhere, and I’m sure could lull the baddies into a false sense of security with his big puppy dog eyes, then go killer attack dog.

    4. The shepherds from the Bible. They’ve clearly got a direct line to God, so they know when important things are going to go down. They know how to be in the right place at the right time.

    5. Cybill Shepherd. Because this pun’s getting more and more laboured, and I’m running out of good ideas.

    6. Umm, Sam (from Ralph and Sam). Sheep dog, that’s close right?

    So my entire team is made up of Shepherds! Boom, boom.

    Damn, that seemed like a good idea when I came up with number one…

  • first, I’d pick old testament god, because he is all powerful and damn angry, perfect guy to have watching your back in a fight, and you have to have god on your side, otherwise invading the lands of other cultures and races isn’t cool.

    Second, I would choose snoop dogg, because he would be good with a gat (or at least a drive by(in space)) and I need a pimp to help me get that space money with them blue space honeys.

    Third would have to be optimus prime, another one that
    would be great in a fight and he makes the crappy mako obselete, oh and he is a huge goddamn robot, do I need to say more?

    Fourth would be some explosive space barrels. They are the bane of video game baddies across time and space, and you feel kinda smart for taking out a guy behind cover by shooting it.

    Fifth an sixth would be scarlet johanson and I so as to take advantage of the obligatory romance subplot between missions. And she might be good in a fight, I guess.

  • Team Win

    1. Red Ranger – Everyones favourite power ranger, will lead the team into battle with his awesome kicks and powers plus his transforming bike! The Red Ranger is used to fighting monsters in rubber suits so he recruited the gaxays finest, finer than sheppard’s crew, and don’t worry, we don’t have any bald chicks.

    2. Dr House – The Team’s medical examiner. He can fix you up when your in pain by putting you in more pain. House is reckless, but so are the battles, so after House did a dodgy job on a blue medic, he got his needle gun.

    3. Mirage – The Autobot who can turn invisible. The team’s stealth bot can infiltrate enemy lines and beat the crap out of the enemy. Plus He’s the Teams ship, well more a race car but he can fly so its a win win for our team.

    4. Wikus Van De Merwe – District 9’s Half man, Half alien was recruited for one reason, he is the only man who can use the gun that makes people explode, very helpful, and funny too.

    5. Valkerie (Too Human) – Just got shot in the face by a Blackstorm? Rammed in the nards by a Vanguard? You need the Valkerie. The Valkerie will revive you from the grave and put you right back on the battlefield, but it takes forever… But don’t lose hope, the Valkerie can also blast enemies in the face.

    6. The Joker – Sheppard gets Joker, we get the Joker. He blows crap up and does it with style, better than anything seth green can do, he just plays with dolls.

    Beat that Sheppard!

  • Yeah, who won yesterday?! Also, I saw the trailer this morning… wow, looks sweeeeeeeet!

    As for my Friday team, Im going to base it upon the classic sci-fi team setup.

    Michael Ironside – the guy has a voice like caramel, smooth and powerful. He’s played Optimus Prime and Rasczak who in my opinion are the two toughest characters ever.

    Billy from Predator – everyone needs the strong silent type on missions like these. With his keen senses and mystical indian powers he is the one you want in a fight to the death. What he lacks in words, he makes up for in shells on the ground.

    Hudson – Ultimately he will crack and lose his mind in the heat of battle, but when the time comes and someone has to make the sacrifice, Hudson will get his sh*t together and do whats best to save the team.

    Carl Jenkins (NPH – Starship Troopers) – A mindreading scientist with a knack for kicking aliens ass and hey… its NPH dude, what more do i need to say?!

    Jar Jar Binks – look, quite possibly the worst choice ever. But if you need someone who will accidentally win the day for you, JJB is your man… or creature… or whatever. If all else fails, JJB can always bore the aliens to death with his speech impediment.

    Valentine McKee (Tremors) – every team needs that scrawny unsung hero who isnt always the sharpest tool in the shed, but knows how to win a fight, be it clean or dirty and who else but Valentine.

  • Sylvester Stallone has already done it for us!
    The Expendables move due out later this year.

    Sylvester Stallones team:
    Jet Li
    Jason Statham
    Dolph Lundgren
    Randy Couture
    Steve Austin
    Mickey Rourke

    With guest appearances by:
    Arnold Schwarzenegger
    Bruce Willis
    Danny Trejo

    Send him Sly a copy!
    Or Ill be happy to have his 😉

  • It’s a hard decision to make really. It’s so easy to just plop Chuck Norris into your squad and call it a day. But overall, you’re going to want people who work well in a group, or else it will just be everyone playing catch up to the one man army.

    1. Captain Price (from the Call of Duty series)
    Captain Price has a certain quality about him in which he ensures that the important members of his squad make it through the end of the day. He is also the all rounder of group, with a variety of skills and untold years of experience with a variety of weapons and in a number of different locals.

    2. Morrigan (from Dragon Age: Origins)
    Morrigan presents the group with a number of useful abilities; namely the use of variety of different magic techniques. These include the ability to change into any number of animal types which could assist the group in any number of ways depending on the obstacles that present themselves on the mission.

    3. Enzio (from Assassins Creed)
    Enzio gives the group the much needed stealth aspect. He’s able to infiltrate the enemy installations and disable their defences with a variety of techniques, allowing the rest of the group to move in and clean up. He can also act as the forward scout of the group; climbing tall buildings to gain a better vantage point.

    4. HK-47 (from Knights of the Old Republic)
    HK-47 brings to the group the much needed ‘member who has no regard for his one life’ card. Because he’s a robot he would be able to take more punishment than the more meatbag members of the group; allowing him to be the bullet magnet giving the group chances to escape or flank.

    5. The Medic (from Team Fortress 2)
    The Medic gives the group the ability to heal their battle wounds, as well as overheal. The medics ability to provide constant medical attention thanks to his medi-gun is without a question essential. He’s a good team player, who’s had to put up with any number of bad team mates in the past. Plus his Ubercharge could prove useful in a pinch.

    6. Ellis (from Left 4 Dead 2)
    Ellis brings to the group the light hearted member. With his wise cracking dialoge and casual attitude to the situations, it can really lighten the mood after killing any number of enemies. Given that he survived over 1000+ zombies all gunning for him, it puts him up their with some of the greatest warriors around, he’s handy with a range of weapons including a frying pan.

  • 1. Harrison Ford, he’s both Indiana Jones AND Han Solo, so that’s bang for your buck.

    2. Samuel L Jackson, in case there are snakes.

    3. Milla Jovovich, between Resident Evil, The Fifth Element and Ultraviolet, she’s more than qualified. And besides, Milla Jovovich is NEVER the wrong answer.

    4. Steve Buscemi, if we run into any googly eyed scary aliens, they might feel more comfortable negotiating with him. If not he can wear their heads as a hat.

    5. Davy Crockett, if I need to leave someone behind to heroically defend to the death while we make our getaway, I can count on him.

    6. Uma Thurman, to create sexual tension with Milla and the charming captain, and I hear she’s pretty good with a sword.

  • 1. Gordon Freeman: He’s got to be the most badass character in video games. Proficient with all types of weaponry, he is a very versatile warrior, perfect for almost every situation. Plus, he’s a scientist so he’ll be able to hack is way into valuable containers of loot, and he’s got the Gravity Gun!
    2. Godzilla: It’s freaking Godzilla! Godzilla has been in about fifty different Japanese monster movies, and he’s cleaned house in them all.
    3. Ben ‘Yahtzee’ Crosshaw: We’ve all seen his reviews. His acerbic wit and cynical view on life itself is capable of even tearing a game widely accepted as being one of the best ever (Oblivion, say) to shreds. If he can do that, then surely he’s capable of making whatever type of supersoldier or enemy we face feel small by criticizing his dress sense or facial hair.
    4. Napoleon Bonaparte: Napoleon is know best as being one of the finest military leaders of all time; which would be useful on this mission as I know next to nothing about military strategies. Because he’s French, he wouldn’t let anyone of my team get hurt in battle, indeed if things started to go slightly askew he’d just surrender and hope that the English finish the job he started (unless France are currently at war with England, of course in which case he’d have to settle for Scotland). And you’ve got to admire anyone that commanded an army by day, but by night bathed in the smell of his many scented candles. Now that’s class.
    5. Heavyweapons Guy (TF2): First off, I’d stick the Heavy in a big suit of armour to make him pretty much impregnable. Then, I’d sent him out in front of the rest of my team to soak up all of the enemy fire. I have no doubt that the Heavy would be able to take this barrage with the minimum of fuss, and if things did go pear-shaped, he’d have an emergency stock of Sandviches to pick him back up. He’d do some serious damage with his minigun, and make it a lot easier for the other members of my team to do their things.
    6. Boba Fett: We all know what this guy can do. He is capable of annihilating entire waves of enemies by himself, let alone with the aid of my expert team. He brings with him a bunch of highly specialized weapons and other gizmos, so he’ll be prepared for whatever situation is thrown at us. Plus, if you dangle the right amount of money in front of him, Boba Fett will do whatever I want, whenever I want. And he’s got valuable sci-fi experience, so he’ll be very well suited to an ME2 style suicide mission.

    There are my picks. Good luck everyone, me especially!

  • Morgan Freeman – every since he was a little boy, people have loved the sound of his voice. No other man on earth could generate the raw power that his words can generate. Noone can narrate a story like Morgan Freeman

    Doc Brown – Roads? who needs…Roads a capable pilot/driver followed by a strong basis in physics, quantum theory. Also he will able to generate the required 1.21 Gigawatts to power his flux capacitor should time travel be necessary.

    James May – Navigation? Check, Speed? Check, Intimate Knowledge of the Universe? Check. If he can Drive a Suzuki across Boliva he can pilot the Normandy across known space.

    Andy Samberg – He has a BOAT MOTHER F*****, with his FLIPITY FLOPS. in addittion his impressive resume allows him to Jizz practically anywhere. Special moves include Dick in a Box, and Punching People before they eat. (also enjoys zombie dancing)

    Nicholas Angel – Because setting out and saving humanity cannot be accomplished without Sandford a village in rural Gloucestershire,s top cop. With an incredible amount of weapons experiance, field experiance and detective ability. His skills would be invaulable. also likes Cornetto’s.

    The Joker (Dark Knight) – HAHA HEHE HOHO, anyone want to see a magic trick? particulary devesating against Geth with there inferior single optical unit. The Joker also brings to the table a good balence of phycotic behaviour and good humour. doesn’t look bad in purple/green either.

  • 1: Arnold Schwarzenegger – his awesome one liners would paralyse his enemies with laughter.

    2: Sylvester Stallone – he knows how to use both fists and guns.

    3: Steven Seagal – The use of his ponytail at long range is deadly.

    4: Dolph Lundgren – so he can communicate with the aliens (cause of his accent).

    5: Chuck Norris – because he’s Chuck Norris.

    6: Wesley Snipes – because every team needs a token black guy.

  • 1. Kratos – to deal bloody, brutal death to all our enemies.

    2. Dr Manhattan (blue dude from Watchmen) – simply because he is able to build and disassemble things in an instant, and teleport anyone anywhere.

    3. Dexter Morgan – a vigilante with a sense of humour; he’ll be able to keep the morale up and capture some prisoners.

    4. TF2 Spy – it’d be great if he could just walk into every battle saying ‘gentlemen.’

    5. Nomad – the Nanosuit. ‘Nuff said.

    6. GlaDOS – cake!

  • 1: Ricky Gervais, would help keep moral up and he is an intellect.

    2: Lady GaGa – Artistic distraction/mis-direction (she wouldn’t look out of place in the Mass Effect universe either).

    3: Robert (Bob) Hawke, Sci-fi drinking interrogator and all around larikin!

    4: Ghandi, would be funny to see a man wearing a Nappie in space, I am also sure he could be very dangerous and he might have fooled us all with his placid nature, fight Ghandi – Yoga Fire!

    5: Darth Jackie-Chan, he’d kick seven shades of $h!te out of any ‘Rebel Scum’, in a funny way too!

    6: Michael Atkinson, ‘Some teammates have to be sacrificed’ – early on hopefully in ‘Team-human shield’.

    • “2: Lady GaGa – Artistic distraction/mis-direction (she wouldn’t look out of place in the Mass Effect universe either)”

      That or cause the ememies’ heads to explode as they try to work out what’s going on in her music videos.

  • 1: Susan Boyle: We will need a riot shield won’t we?

    2: Michael Atkinson: A deadly mission hey, meaning not everyone will make it back alive right?

    3: A Predator: Stealth, brute strength, mounted plasma cannon, he makes up for my first two ‘expendable choices’.

    4: War: As one of the horseman of the apocalypse, who better to have on your side when battling the fierce enemies of the galaxy

    5: Commander Shepard: I’m certainly not the most skilled soldier, so I will delegate the combat duties to Shepard, and I’ll wait back at the Normandy. 🙂

    6: Karl Pilkington: The internet phenomenon will keep me entertained during space travel, with classic ‘monkey news’ stories. Check him out.

  • 1- Harvey Birdman (Harvey Birdman – Attorney at Law) – With his quick mind on all matters legal should we get into strife, and the awesome power of The Crest On Birdman’s Helmet!

    2- Mentok, the Mind Taker (Harvey Birdman – Attorney at Law) – When there are minds for the taking, there is no one better. Master of mental manipulation manifesting marvels that make Marmaduke morose!

    3- Brock Samson (The Venture Brothers) – 7 Feet tall and just as wide, 110% of his body weight is muscle and he’s a stone cold killer with a heart of gold. Also master of seduction with a killer mullet/perm combo to boot!

    4- Zorak (The Brak Show) – A psychopath with an immense armoury, not afraid of anything and has an uncanny ability to provoke Thundercleese.

    5- Thundercleese (The Brak Show) – Gigantic war robot with the power of flight, seemingly unlimited weaponry, and a dead fish (ham overdose). Combine his already short temper with Zorak’s ability to provoke him further, and Thundercleese explodes with the power of a thousand suns (probably)

    6- Killface (Frisky Dingo) – 7 feet tall, full of muscle, pale white skin and freakish talon feet he’ll definitely come in handy in a fight. Has survived having a hole blown in his chest, so injuries arent a worry, and controls the Awesome Power Of The Annihilatrix. And most importantly, a loving family man who accepts his son’s (fake) homosexuality. Because family matters!

    And that’s the A(dultswim)-Team!

  • 1- chuck norris (no explanation needed)
    2- mal renolds ( from firefly, he could use his wit to get us out of sticky situations
    3-samuel l jackson ( because know one would mess with him)
    4-jason stratham ( you always need someone british who can kick arse)
    5-ross noble ( for comic relief)
    6- mad max (he can survive anything)

  • 1. “The Bride” (Kill Bill) – her skills of disposing large groups of people with just her blade would come in handy.

    2. Wolverine (X-Men) – a man who cannot be harmed with a rage like no other. Not to mention his natural weapons!

    3. Buffy (Buffy the Vampire Slayer) – Lots of experience in taking down the “big bad”, has managed to die twice and still stands. Strong, smart and resourceful – would bring also bring plenty of light-hearted jokes to the mix.

    4. Solid Snake (Metal Gear Solid) – for those situations that require a bit of sneaky espionage. Infinite ammo bandana would come in handy too!

    5. Macgyver (Macgyver) – for those tricky situations where resources are scarce. Useful for many, many problem solving skills, including disarming nuclear weapons with paperclips.

    6. Balthier (FFXII) – Bringing the group some necessary charm and style. Pirate skills, handy with a gun, and can fly an airship too.

  • Chief Inspector Clouseau – Because no one else is better at distraction.

    The Monster in the Shadows from Order of the Stick – Because no one else is better at extraction.

    Galactus – Because no one else is better at destruction.

    Inara from Firefly – Because no one else is better at interaction.

    V from V for Vendetta – Because no one else is better at insurrection.

    Chuck Norris – Because no one else is better at action.

  • I would recruit all the Nerdlucks out of Space Jam, in their big basketballer state (for those not in the know, Nerdlucks –>


    They’re smart, they’re aliens, they’re well-versed in interplanetary travel, they are the size of oak trees. Let’s face it, they were the coolest thing in Space Jam and they make any geth soldier oil in his Torso Rotary-Axis.

    Oh wait there was only 5 nerlucks! Hmm… I would also recruit BILL MURRAY. He was also in Space Jam and well, it’s Bill Murray! He’s fricken awesome!

  • 1) Cream the Rabbit
    2) Chip
    3) Marine the Raccoon
    4) Silver the Hedgehog
    5) Blaze the Cat
    6) Eggman Nega

    I don’t trust those Project Needlemouse rumours, so I’m sending those unnecessary characters on a suicide mission to make sure they never appear in a game again!

  • 1. Marcus Fenix – This guy is a bandanna wearing badass with a stash of roids.

    2. Michael Atkinson – The demonic face and ridiculous ego and beliefs of The Atkinson are enough to send anyone cowering in fear.

    3. Arthas – He’s got a cool sword. What else can i say?

    4. Rambo – This guy doesnt even need a team. That’s why we need him.

    5. Wolverine – An adamantium skeleton, animal-keen senses, quick recovery and healing to virtually any wound, disease or toxin and retractable claws. This guy is tank.

    6. Grimace – A giant purple anthropomorphic tastebud. In a time of war, everyone can use a cheeseburger.

  • 1. Corey Worthington – He knows how to party and how to disappear when things get out of hand.

    2. Bindi Irwin – Her vast zoological knowledge would be invaluable when visiting alien word and her ‘Kid Fitness’ DvDs would keep the rest of the crew in top shape.

    3. My mum – An unopposable force, she provides such skills as warm meals, nagging and an Intimidate score that can’t be measured by modern RPG engines

    4. The guy that kills Tsu’tey in James Cameron’s Avatar – Tsu’tey jumps into the back of a marine jumpship and take out two armed guys in one graceful move, so you’d think he’d be the obvious addition to the team. But no! This one guy, who isn’t even mentioned in the credits, keeps his head under pressure and plugs Tsu’tey full of lead! And then as Tsu’tey is dying in slow motion, he plugs two more Na’vi warriors! That guy rules.

    5. Natalie Portman – Let’s see how well that restraining order works when she’s trapped on a space ship with me, MWAHAHAHA

    6. And finally Ma-Ti, with the power of heart

  • Crew:

    1. James Bond (Anyone that can take a solid hit to the nuts and laugh it off HAS to be a badass!)

    2. Anne Frank (If she could hide a bunch of Jews from the Nazis then imagine what she could do here! oh wait… she didn’t hide forever… ohhhhh)

    3. Arnie (He could run the government while travelling back in time to save John Connor)


    5. Neytiri (From Avatar – This will keep all the furies in check for an awkward sex scene)

    6. My good friend Alan, the creator of Dead Baby Jokes! (This way everyone shoots at him, rather than me!)
    Some examples of his controversial comedy
    Q: What’s blue and white and rests at the bottom of a pool?
    A: A baby with slashed floaties!

    Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
    A: Depends how hard you throw them!

    Q: What’s white and black and bobs up and down in a baby’s crib?
    A: Michael Jackson’s Zombie Ass!

    Q: What’s the difference between babies and M&M’s?
    A: You can’t load M&M’s into the back of a truck with a pitchfork!

    Now the grand finale
    Q: How do you get 100 babies into a barrel?
    A: With a Blender!
    Q: How do you get them out again?
    A: With Doritos!

    W…. why is no one laughing? Why are you all looking at me so seriously? Commmmooonnnn, its not like I killed them! That was Alan!

    Noel “A little necrophilia never killed anyone” Stewart


  • 1. Fat Princess – Meat Shield – And you gotta eat.
    2. Dog Meat – It’s all in the name.
    3. A boy – because the blob won’t listen to me
    4. And his blob – Magic beans – need i say more.
    5. Alucard – If death rears it’s ugly head – i want to become a vampire damn it.
    6. Guybrush Threepwood – When fighting with weapons just does not cut it.

  • I would take the following band O’mercenaries

    Lion-O from the Thundercats- He can use the Sword of Omens to scout for us and drive the Mako because he is used of driving impractical vehicles.

    Conan the Barbarian- Can boost morale with tales of high adventure and is used of seeing freaky monsters so aliens should be okay.

    Jeannie from :I Dream of Jeannie- She can teleport us around saving fuel and can dace for entertainment while we clap and eat beef shanks.

    Heman- Can keep Conan in check.

    Vince Sham Wow Sholomi- can sell Sham Wow’s at the marketplace to bring in extra credits, just keep him away from the asari consort!

    Optimus Prime- Can open the Matrix of leadership to kill the reapers while the party sings “The Touch” by Stan Bush.

  • 1. MacGyver – Obviously, the man can do anything with anything.

    2. Sonic the Hedghog – Small, lightening fast, and has a mean guided spin attack.

    3. Luke Skywalker – The force is strong with this one

    4. Cyberdyne Systems Model 101 Terminator (From Terminator 2 & 3) – Hard to kill, his combat ability is second to none. He also has a amazing ability to dish out awesome one liners.

    Now five was tricky. It was a toss up between Riddick and Snake Pliskin. Both can escape from any situation. but..
    5. Snake Pliskin (Escape from NY & LA) – The coolest man alive.

    Six was also difficult, after all, it is a bit of a sausage fest here, so it was between Halle Berry’s Catwoman and Jessica Alba’s Sue Storm.
    6. Sue Storm – Hot and can become invisible (an infinitly handy trait).

  • 1. Cheech and Chong – smoking and growing for the intergalatic travel avoiding the authorities and wreaking havoc on anything they touch

    2. Han Solo – I’ve seen him fly Millenium Falcon, dodging the Tie Fighters with Darth Vadar and co, someone who is handy and reliable i think he will do more than what Joker does from the Normandy crew. (Chewbacca would be a great addition to the crew too, he can fix almost anything too)

    3. Hermione – Can’t live without Emma and well magic and brains would definitely be needed if they are gonna be campanions of Cheech and Chong dutching up the place

    4 V (V for Vendetta) – The only verdict is vengeance; a vendetta, held as a votive, not in vain, for the value and veracity of such shall one day vindicate the vigilant and the virtuous. A man with a purpose is a man that will not fail me. Remember remember the 5th of November. (5th Nov is my birthday too)

    5. Elena Fisher – “Last year’s model”, pure wits and guts and exciting personality to hang with

    6. Morgan Freeman – God.

  • 1: Phil Ken Sebben (Harvey Birdman, Attorney-at-law)
    – tank driving skills
    – eye patch (bad ass), and
    – OMG he’s fricking crazy

    2: Chuck Bartowski (Chuck)
    – he could ‘flash’ and do all kinds of cool stuff… so skill points would be irrelevant

    3: The Todd (Scrubs)
    – Freak the geth out with his homo-erotic vibes
    – ‘Death-five!’

    4: Pedro Sánchez (Napoleon Dynamite)
    – Motivated
    – Awesome Hair
    – At the end of the game when all the politicians DIE again, you’ve got somebody to elect… VOTE FOR PEDRO!

    5: Donny (The Big Lebowski)
    – Every team needs somebody to abuse. I we can just yell “STFU Donny” all the time…
    – Somebody in your team always has to die. Donny has a weak heart so, he’s easy to let go of

    I mean, so what if nobody in my team is particularly good at shooting or anything… in the end, don’t you want to get all the sweet head shots?

  • My super happy fun time mega team

    1. Seth Green- if he can pilot the Normandy without legs, imagine what he could do with them (hint: hilarious stop motion animation)

    2. Disco Stu- He kicks ass and has goldfish in his shoes. He doesnt have to advertise.

    3.Billy Corgan- Ex smashing pumpkins front man and scariest looking mofo on the planet. The fact that he is boning jessica simpson means he will bring invaluable negotiation skills to the team

    4.The Green Ranger- Managed to make two different ranger costumes look badass. A lock for pulling off the myriad of armor types available in ME2

    5. LeBron James- Blinds Geth with pregame powder ritual and finishes them off with skillz that killz

    6.Joe Pesci- engages enemies in dialogue over what kinda funny he is, then procedes to shoot them in the foot.

  • 1: Phil Ken Sebben (Harvey Birdman, Attorney-at-law)
    – tank driving skills
    – eye patch (bad ass), and
    – OMG he’s fricking crazy

    2: Chuck Bartowski (Chuck)
    – he could ‘flash’ and do all kinds of cool stuff… so skill points would be irrelevant

    3: The Todd (Scrubs)
    – Freak the geth out with his homo-erotic vibes
    – ‘Death-five!’

    4: Pedro Sánchez (Napoleon Dynamite)
    – Motivated
    – Awesome Hair
    – At the end of the game when all the politicians DIE again, you’ve got somebody to elect… VOTE FOR PEDRO!

    5: Donny (The Big Lebowski)
    – Every team needs somebody to abuse. I we can just yell “STFU Donny” all the time…
    – Somebody in your team always has to die. Donny has a weak heart so, he’s easy to let go of

    6: Scooter (Borderlands)
    – Free cars
    – He can bring some of the bazillions of guns

    I mean, so what if nobody in my team is particularly good at shooting or anything… in the end, don’t you want to get all the sweet head shots?

  • Matt Bellamy (muse) – he is in the country and he has some awesome Chaos pad which he could do damage with on his guitar.

    John Travolta – He can dance his way over any enemies (seriously he dances in every movie he is in)

    Ray Martin – Key weapon, plastic hair… its sharp, and it kills better than a dagger.

    Belinda Neal – she will bash you for not giving her the right table she wants… imagine if you actually attacked her.

    Phil Ken Sebben – With his wit, charm and one good eye, he would be the best of snipers

    Stacy Kiebler – every team needs a hot chick… she is one…

  • 1. The Scientist from Timeshift – He would be a great asset, zooming past the enemies in slowed-down time.

    2. Gordon Freeman – He would be great since he has already taken down the U.S. Military and entire alien races, but also because if we come upon a blocked door, other teams would be trapped, but we would be safe, thanks to Gordon’s trusty crowbar.

    3. Tequila Yuen – Tequila would be excellent, after all, he took out two entire gangs in what can be viewed as only a few days.

    4. Cloud Strife – With his trusty buster blade and spells to make him stronger, plus the ultima-blade and Fenrir, He would essentially own the battlefield.

    5. Wesley Gibson – The perfect weapon, he could dish out pain and death on the battlefield, and just generally kill, Yeah, he’s not really that good for anything else.

    6. Q – Imagine the kind of stuff he could make with future technology. We’d be an unstoppable force with an army of techno robots and invisible cars.

    Valid Email: scottgardner23(at)gmail(dot)com

  • Jason Statham as Chev Chelios in Crank – His heart is about to stop beating so he’s hardly going to waste time. He also falls out of an airplane and lives for the sequel.

    David Letterman – The only thing that will stop him from being on time is grave illness. Solid, funny, sophisticated and a little bit ‘dude’.

    IDDQD – God Mode.

    Longcat – The sheer length of longcat will leave enemies confused and liable to easy head shots.

    George Jetson – As a kid, he had to traverse 10 miles of asteroid storms to go to High School

    Will Smith – Excellent one liners, and when it gets rough he’ll bust into family friendly rap, giving everyone a chance to up their HP and exchange items.

  • Daniel Garner – he battled his way out of hell
    John Candy – every team needs a Funny man
    Venom Punisher – Perfect for eliminating enemies with Extreme Prejudice
    Nick Naylor (Negotiator) – because he can handle any situation and make everyone agree with him
    Albert Wesker – Traded his humanity for power and Near Immortality, anyone willing to go those extreme for their Goals would be perfect for any Mission
    Corporal Adrian Shepherd – Just to bring to him back for a special Guest Appearance

  • Sigourney Weaver: Not only gorgeous, this savvy vixen boasts a long resume; fighting off hordes of xenomorphic pests, holding extra-terrestrial linguistic finesse, and experience dealing with forces of the ectoplasmic variety. She brings to the team both skill and class.

    Leeroy Jenkins: An impulsively daring brute, this hero is unmeasureably brave and always the first to charge into battle.

    Frank: My brave and noble pup. As man’s best friend, this ball-of-muscle Frank embodies loyalty and fevour unmatched by any other on the team.

    Nina Kulagina: Brilliant psychic of the Soviet era, a foe will not breathe in her direction before falling. Capable of spoon bending until the spoon itself is no more, she is an invaluabled member of the team and shows us that you can do anything if you put your mind to it.

    Little Sister: Sending an unnerving song of war across the battlefield, Little Sister of Bioshock fame is the most unassuming of all team members. Neither naive nor innocent as her appearance suggests, she turns fallen enemies into fuel for the mind of Nina Kulagina.

    Nietzsche – the God Slayer: Armed with the knowledge of the endless cycle of existence, Nietzsche is the final member of our team and leads the team with an insight of purity that sees them ‘be what they are’. His fanaticism challenges all who oppose them.



        1. Alf from TV
        2. Alf from Home and Away (flamin’ hell!)
        3. Harold from Neighbours
        4. Dude from Bewitched (the original Mad Man)
        5. B. A. Baracus (B.A. stands for BAD ATTITUDE!)
        6. Magnum P.I.

  • 1. Megatron, Transformers – He turns into a gun

    2. Bear Grylls, Man vs. Wild – Expert survivalist, amusing accent

    3. Gary Oldman – So obviously a bad guy that he could never betray the group

    4. Dutch, Predator – “It’s only one mile to the mako!”

    5. Hal, 2001 A Space Odyssey – Expert on mission objectives, easy storage

    6. The Tin Man, The Wizard of Oz – Heartless killer

  • Well, we’re heading out to save the galaxy, or humanity, or something equally epic. There’s no-one I’d rather have along than my family, so let’s put them in first:

    My Wife,
    My Son,
    My Daughter

    In addition, I think we’d all benefit from the wisdom which the people who taught me what I know can provide:

    My father,
    My mother

    And finally, as he’s always a good companion, and he would be lonely at home without us:

    Our dog.

    All of them are good game players (in their own ways) and we all (well, other than the dog, perhaps) know that the unassuming heroes of great stories are always provided with the resources and training they require in order to get the job done, one way or another, so I’m not worried we’ll be under-skilled.

    Most of all, though, they are the people I’d most like to share any epic experience with.

    Watch out, universe! We’re on our way!

  • 1. Richard Nixon – Any team needs a tricky dicky.

    2. Iggy Pop – Skin like leather, Impervious to illicit substances.

    3. David Bowie – Would probably own a knife, attractive to women (and men).

    4. Steve Irwin – plucky but irrational, excellent with animals and distraction.

    5. Game & Watch – Would excel at vending machine theft.

    6. Kanye West – Imma gonna let yo finish…

  • 1. Anton Chigurh – [No Country for Old Men] – Because he’ll get the job done no matter what.

    2. Tyler Durden – [Fight Club] – For motivation

    3. Vic Mackey – [The Shield] – He’s got incredible good luck and gets results.

    4. Spock – [Star Trek T.O.S.] – Nerve Pinch for quick and silent takedowns

    5. Jackie Chan – Anything and Everything can become a weapon for Jackie, plus he does his own stunts.

    6. Dave Lizewski / Kick-Ass – [Kick-Ass] – That kid has balls; A true hero.

  • As i have previously stated, i would be taking Roger Ramjet and 5 of his precious American Eagles trekking across the galaxy with me. Able to harness the power of 20 atom bombs in one bite size proton energy pill would really set the competition on edge and it would be downright hilarious to watch Roger punch the hell out of Saren, the Council, Wrex, hell anyone getting that trademark repeated punch from Ramjet is great to watch, where he holds them by the neck and beats their face again and again and again. We could map that one to the right bumper huh?? Of course we could His class might resemble the new Vanguard but with more punching and pill-popping to replace the biotics… They also pack a kickass song that we could all sing as we traipse around the galaxy, we all know that things can get a bit boring if we all suffer in silence, and we all know that having child soldiers around is good for morale. My intimidate score would be through the roof, and Roger’s pompous manner and general disregard for administrative procedures would be handy in dealing with, well once again Saren, the Council, the dumbass Cerberus corporation… And who needs to explore those lifeless, so called “planets” when we can solve most situations with a friendly nuke. And as for the satisfaction of Roger emoting: BOOM! Headshot, i would say that would be priceless. As they say: “When Ramjet takes a proton pill the Cerberus Corporation begins to worry, they can’t escape their awful fate and proton’s mighty fury”. now send me that game!! whoo

  • 1. Keyboard Cat

    The team bard, essential for keeping spirits high. While he would probably never leave the ship, the Keyboard Cat would provide us with mirth upon our return, playing appropriate tunes over the video footage we captured of the genocide we would have just committed. If there’s anything Shepherd could have done with in the original game, it was a good laugh or two.

    2. Pooh Bear

    For one thing, Pooh is a scavenger. He’s an expert at finding abnormally large amounts of honey in woods that seem to be all but devoid of bees, and would thus be perfect for sniffing out new armour and weapons and the like. Beyond that, he’s a bear, and thus capable of unimaginable carnage. Having perfectly built up cover through his television show and books as a bumbling, cheerful fellow, his untapped ferocity would catch enemies by surprise.

    3. Maxwell from Scribblenauts

    This one is cheating a bit – Max could summon an unholy number of monsters, devils and weapons, making him an invaluable resource. Of course he’d probably accidentally stumble off a cliff into a pool of lava within 5 seconds of landing on any given planet, but as long as his notebook survives, we’d be set.

    4. The Inanimate Carbon Rod from The Simpsons

    In case any doors open in space. And it’s always good to have a true hero on your side.

    5. Gordon Ramsay

    Not only could the ship do with a good chef (have you ever tried space cabbage?), but the conversation options he’d open up would be amazing. Every discussion would carry a ‘blow it out your f***ing arse, you tosspot’ option, which would surely resolve most conflicts before they’d even begun. That, and he’s probably quite handy with a butcher’s knife.

    6. David Wildgoose

    Essentially I would offer to transport him safely home once the mission was over in exchange for a copy of Mass Effect 2 on 360. Last I heard he had about six or seven copies just lying around.

  • 1. Han Solo- (Star Wars) He’s always an awesome badass sidekick
    2. Spock- (Star Trek) Because the crew needs more pointy eared folk
    3. T3 M4- (KOTOR) There weren’t any friendly, party droid characters in ME1, so here’s one. T3 was always handy with locks in KOTOR with my Jedi Guardian class.
    4. Bill- (Left 4 Dead) He would be a very interesting character to talk to. Plus Shepard and Bill are both war heroes, they can relate to each other.
    5. Soldier- (Team Fortress 2) There wasn’t enough explosions in ME1, so we’ll need the rocket trooper.
    6. Anonymous- (4Chan) Surely they can do a raid on the Geth or something for the lulz right?

  • My Team Discovery Channel

    1, Bruce Lee, in low gravity he would be lethal, plus dubbed speech paths would be awesome.

    2, Fat Jesus (Alan in The hangover). The wolf pack speech and the best of friend’s song would boost even the lowest of moral.

    3, Zim from Invader Zim, Anyone that destroys their home planet is a keeper, also his quest to destroy humans gives much needed empathy to the geth.

    4, Richard Dean Anderson, the very nucleus of Macgyver and Col Jack O’Neil

    5, L. Ron Hubbard, his intergalactic networking skills and understanding of thetan, money can’t buy that.

    6, Tyra Banks, I need someone that can relate to my ever growing fear of dolphins, who bare some resemblance to the geth.(yes she has dolphobia)

    Go team Discovery Channel.

  • 1. Miranda Kerr- Sex appeal
    2. Jennifer Hawkins- Sex appeal
    3. Jessica Alba- Sex appeal
    4. Megan Fox (minus the toe-thumb)- Sex appeal
    5. Seth Rogan- Sex appeal

  • The six people (real, fictional or possibly not even people) I would recruit to join me on the most dangerous mission of all are:

    1. Sarah Connor from Terminator – she is determined and crazy, dangerous missons run through her veins

    2. Alice from Resident Evil – she is tough and rugged and suffers from amnesia so she would just keep coming back for more!

    3. Lara Croft – she is a reckless English archaeologist-adventurer and is looking for danger!

    4. Michelle Rodriguez – is dangerous in her private life with hit n runs and getting into fights as well as on the screen.

    5. Orihime from Bleach – She has a tendency to rush into situations without thinking and would dazzle any opponent with her beauty.

    6. Tank Girl – this outlaw could drive the team around in her tank leading them into all types of dangerous missions with her to random acts of sex and violence

  • 1. Bruce Willis – Because he’s John Motherfucking Mclane, that’s why! He took on a skyscraper full of terrorists with nothing but a wifebeater and an extensive vocabulary of profanities! Admittedly, the plan may backfire when, weary from battle, I begin to question whether he’s been dead the entire time.

    2. Christine Hendricks – Have you seen this woman? HAVE YOU? I rest my case.

    3. Verne Troyer – Because sometimes in a fight, when things appear their most dire, you have to throw a midget at somebody. It may not be the greatest offensive tactic, but I’ll be damned if it isn’t hilarious.

    4. Mike Tyson – In all honesty I didn’t want to recruit him at all, but he was very insistent on coming along. Tell me, would you be willing to say no to him? I mean, in the middle of conversation, the man coughed up a hearing aid covered in blood for God’s sake!

    5. An extensive collection of pornography – Let’s face it, Christina Hendricks probably has standards.

    6. A fridge – It will keep my beer cold and it’s apparently resistant to nuclear explosions, what more could I want? Draw a face on it and it even becomes my best friend once the insanity kicks in.

    Universe, prepare to be saved, you son of a bitch.

  • 1) Batman – arguably the only person needed, he has a plan for every situation, he knows how to exploit an enemies weakness i.e. kryptonite ring to beat superman

    2) Pokemon Trainer – Pokemon are strong by themselves, having an entire party of them under the control of a trainer on my team would be unstopable

    3) Jack sparrow – Able to bluff his way out of any situation, his ‘just crazy enough to work’ plans will spring us from any sticky spot. A full grown male grizzle Bear – It might not be smart or even capable of weilding techonology, but 500 kgs of fur and muscle should never be argued with.

    4) A full grown male grizzle Bear – It might not be smart or even capable of weilding techonology, but 500 kgs of fur and muscle should never be argued with.

    5) Fry – As well as being slow and dimwitted Fry brings no combat talent to the team, but somehow in the end he manages to save the day through sheer dumb luck.

    6) Stanley Kubrick – Someone needs to film the greatest showdown in the history of the universe, Space Oddessy: 2183 doesn’t have any monoliths but it has everything else.

  • Taking a leaf out of a Monty Python sketch (…), I thought I’d theme my list a touch differently:

    1. Bruce Campbell – Keeps a cool head when dealing with deadites, mummies and Spider-man. Handy with a shotgun and a one-liner.
    2. Bruce Willis – Impervious to damage, his wife-beater-and-dirt-encrused-face are synonymous with the underdog winning the day. Yippee-ki-aye, m-
    3. Bruce Wayne – …he’s Batman.
    4. Bruce Banner – You won’t like him when he’s angry. And neither will the Geth. Or rogue Spectres. Or your team-mates…
    5. Bruce Springsteen – If you’re saving the universe, having a rocking anthem wouldn’t do you any harm.
    6. Bruce Lee – Sure, they have biotic powers. He’s got the one-inch punch

    Is there a single better name?!


  • 1. The Incredible Hulk (HULK SMASH!)
    – for any heavy lifting that needs doing.

    2. War (From darksiders)
    – come on, the guy’s a bad ass

    3. Chuck Norris
    – Chuck Norris doesn’t have a control key on his computer, Chuck Norris is always in control

    4. R2D2
    come on, it’s R2D2

    5. some rather attractive female
    (come on, it get’s lonely in space)

    6. Harvey Birdman Attorney at Law

  • Wow, its kinda hard to choose a party, but ill do my best.

    1. An Unlikely Hero – Me:
    While i may not be space cowboy, or a inter galactic general, my dedication will help keep this group together, we shall not fail.

    If our party happens to fail, i have no one else to blame but myself.

    2. The Sexy Assassin – Bayonetta:
    A party always needs a person who you can rely on to get the dirty jobs done, and with this choice i get to assassinate my enemies with style.

    With her legs, they should die smiling.

    3. The Comic Relief – Simon Pegg:
    He has been in many movies from battling zombies to space battles. If i wanted anyone to give me a good laugh in the face of danger, it would be him.

    4. The Bad Ass – Reggie Fils-Aime:
    Who else would you want, with skills like “kicking ass” and “taking names” what boss would be able to stand up to us?

    And with a cash flow as big as his, we would always have money for upgrades.

    5. The Rock – The Rock:
    The Universe is under threat, the people needs a champion, and there is only one peoples champion.

    He has a Game Plan, Walking Tall, no one can stand up to us, not even the Tooth Fairy.

    6. The Spy – Sean Connery:
    In a universe where the lives are shaken, not stirred, the times need a smooth spy, one who laughs in the face of danger.

    No woman will be able to resist his charms, and able to get out of any situation, no matter how dire. He is the perfect choice.

  • 1. Fedor Emelienenko – 33 professional MMA matches and no losses (don’t argue about Kohsaka, that wasn’t a loss). The toughest mutha on earth.

    2. Bruce Banner – Super smart scientist, and if he gets shot, he’ll get angry…..and you wouldn’t like him when he’s angry.

    3. Thanos – Outer space is his ‘hood. Possesses superhuman strength and has already been augmented via bionic amplification, mysticism, and the entity Death….which is pretty cool. Oh! and he can travel through time and parallel universes too……also, Infinity Gauntlet

    4. Station (Bill & Teds Bogus Journey) – The most brilliant scientist in the entire universe, and can build good robot us’s to defeat bad robot us’s….if that happens.

    5. Lobo (DC Comics) – A total bad-ass immortal that can clone himself AND TRACK SOMEONE ACROSS A GALAXY BY HIS SENSE OF SMELL!!! He’s totally awesome with explosives and hooks on chains.

    6. Broly – His power is maximum.

  • 1. Jay Leno – For his ability to steal
    2. Conan ‘O’ Brien – For his ability to do a deal
    3. David Letterman – For his ability to kick when their down
    4. CBS – For their ability to kill stuff
    5. My Mum – She has a viperous tongue!

  • 1. The Doctor (Doctor Who) (Preferably David Tenant’s Doctor) – even without his TARDIS, he seems to be able to find a way out of any situation, normally without even needing to incur any casualties. Capable of getting information from anyone, the Doctor also has an unmatched knowledge of the universe and basically everything in it. Adding a load of paragon and conscience to the party, The Doctor still manages to be that guy no one wants to be on the bad side of. Quirky and funny.

    2. Mal Reynolds (Firefly) – can casually out-shoot any opponent (just look at the fed in the first episode!). Adds a nice flair of humour and can be a real arse to anyone who gets in his way.

    3. Echo (Dollhouse) – with the right imprint, Echo could be the most useful member of the team, capable of having any skill, talent or even accent! Master of espionage and everything else, Echo also serves as the necessary token hot-chick and possible love interest?

    4. Dr Gregory House (House M.D) – His analytical mind would be unmatched on any other team and would serve well to solve any problems that the team come across (like the Tower’s of Hanoi from ME1). Most importantly, House has the epic heals.

    5. Magneto (Xmen) – There is no chance that the Geth or any other kind of synthetic robot army can stand up the this man. With Magneto on the team, any approaching droid would simply be torn to pieces and tied into a knot!

    6. Jeremy Clarkson (Top Gear) – While the Stig may be some people’s first choice for team driver, you have to remember that Clarkson can do a couple of things the Stig just doesn’t seem to be capable of, the least of which is talk. As well as this, Clarkson seems able to easily outwit and insult anyone he comes across as well as bring great publicity and possibly some controversy. Most importantly of all…POWERRRR!

  • Winners like that make me think that you don’t read or care about what people write…

    I could have just shit on my keyboard and had a better chance of winning.

  • Kirby – Who doesn’t want to see Geth Kirby, Krogan Kirby, Turian Kirby and Asari Kirby?
    Tingle – A useful team member when exploring, Tingle can fly ahead of the group with his balloon and map out the environment. If that’s not enough, he can even drop bombs on your enemies (he’s also a master quasar player).
    Mr Resetti – In a tight spot? Call on Mr Resetti’s “Yell” ability. Before you know it he’ll pop out of the ground in front of your enemies and give them a tongue lashing like never before. Your foe’s will be crying and begging for forgiveness within seconds.
    Barbarella – Miss the sex scenes from Mass Effect 1? Well in the sequel Barbarella will help you to unwind……AFTER EVERY MISSION…….FOR EVERY CREW MEMBER. That’s right, Barbarella will have your entire crew in such a state of elation that they couldn’t care less if the Reapers wiped out the entire Universe.
    Magikarp – He can splash water on enemies?………….just you wait till he evolves, then you’ll be sorry. Magikarp’s inventory consists of only one item…..EXP Share.

  • 1. James Cameron
    – He can bore enemies to death with slick 3D graphics and terribly trite story lines.

    2. George Lucas
    – He can confuse enemies by writing the best sci-fi movie of all time and then the worst sci-fi movie of all time.

    3. Tim Burton
    – He can confound enemies with his weird and twisted vision. And he’d bring Johnny Depp which is an extra bonus.

    4. Peter Jackson
    – He can introduce the enemy to the Feebles.

    5. Duncan Jones
    – He can teach all the other directors how it’s done. Also, he’s David Bowie’s son, so a double extra bonus.

    6. Michael Bay
    – because shit needs to blow up.

  • 1. Tom Cruise. He is a 247th Level scientologist, so he has unlocked the high end skills of contacting the invisible alien ships that are hanging out above earth… Also in a tight spot he can jump up and down on couches to distract huge crowds of women, allowing stealth teams to slip by.

    2. A Can opener. because what easier way to open up a geth?

    3. Bayonetta. We could really use a chick who can do the splits whilst shooting not one, but two pistols at once. Plus when she really gets into it, her clothes flow off… stunning the enemy, and then eventually killing them!!

    4. Arthas Menethil. He commands a never ending army of undead minions.. has sick looking armour AND doesnt need air and is immune to cold… would be good for sending him out to fix holes in the hull of the ship!

    5.Doctor Phil. When guns and grenades just wont cut it.. this guy can sit your foes down, breaking up their psyche and getting down to the root of thier issues.. giving them new direction in life and ideas on how to achieve interstellar domination WITHOUT having to resort to violence or genocide against humans.

    6. Claire Bennet (heroes). umm…. she can’t die? and is super hot?? i dont feel this needs any more explaination 🙂

  • 1. Silent BOB
    2. Jay
    3. Randal
    4. Dante
    5. dolph lundgren
    6. lando calrissian only black guy ever to fly the millenium falcon

  • 1. A furry companion, because It’s neccessary that every game must have a animal sidekick.
    2. A doctor. Rather self-explanatory.
    3. A cook, we can’t save humanity with empty stomachs.
    4. The designer from ‘Pimp my Ride’, so we can go through space in style.
    5. An attractive person. Again self-explanatory.
    6. An alien so everyone around us can see we are totally not rascist, before we backhand them for the hell of it.

  • #1 – Walter Bishop (from fringe) – He’s a mad scientist who enjoys making all sorts of hallucinogenics, doing weird experiments and is an expert on fringe science

    #2 – John McClane – protagonist, vigilante, hero. Whats not to love?

    #3 – Dexter Morgan – Clean, cold blooded killer. with a sense of humor to boot. Everyone needs a little Dexter Morgan in their life.

    #4 – Project Alice/ Alice (Milla Jovovich, Resident evil) – you always need a bio weapon with super human abilities. Having someone that can kill people with their mind is ALWAYS a plus.

    #5 – Frank West – Photojournalist, He’s covered wars, you know.

    #6 – Ras Ah Ghul – Everyone needs a ninja assassin / terrorist on their team. Not to mention he’s several hundred years old.

  • I’ll take a mass relay to the Command and Conquer universe, and pick up Tanya (the epic commando) and five engineers.

    While Tanya wreaks all sorts of havoc, the engineers rush the base, and it’s GAME OVER!

  • 1, David Letterman
    2, Jay Leno
    3, Conan O’Brien
    4, Jimmy Kimmel
    5, Jimmy Fallon
    6, Craig Ferguson

    Because if everything fails, I can at least see all the late night talk show hosts duke it out like that Taiwan cgi clip.

  • 1. Jack Thompson
    2. Michael “Mick” Atkinson
    3. Stephen Conroy
    4. A guide to blaming censorship issues on mission objectives
    5. popcorn
    6. delicious latte

    • I should note that the reason why I chose a latte and popcorn is so I can relax yet stay motivated with all of the PURE JUSTICE I’d be leading!


  • 1) Seth Green
    2) Shohreh Aghdashloo
    3) Martin Sheen
    4) Yvonne Strahovski
    5) Tricia Helfer
    6) Adam Baldwin

    … wait…

  • 1. Sonic
    2. a golden ring
    3. N/A
    4. N/A
    5. N/A
    6. N/A
    This is the most effective team you can have. Sonic’s got a pretty high chance on the mission considering he can survive gunfire, lasers, missiles and lava as long as he’s holding 1 ring.

    If he wins he gets a redemption, we share the earnings. But like Sonic or the ring care about money. Give him a chilli dog, give the ring a polish (or a fellow ring), and we all happy!!!

    He dies, that’s one down. We still have Lara Croft, Uwe Boll, Banjo, etc. to recruit before they ruin our childhood memories.

  • [Transcript from first meeting of the Citadel Globetrotters]

    — 8:35pm Globetrotter HQ —

    Me: Alright everyone, I’ve called you all in because I need you to help me on the most dangerous mission of all time. You are here because You are the best at what you do. We’ll start with a roll call, when I call your name, tell me what you bring to this team. Die Hard?

    Die Hard: It’s John McClane.

    Me: Whatever Die Hard.

    Die Hard: I’m a New York City Cop, I enjoy walking on glass, big guns, wailing on European terrorists, getting shot and surviving an unrealistic amount of explosions.

    Me: Bueller?


    Me: Bueller? Bueller? Bueller? Bueller? Bueller?

    [Door opens, Ferris Bueller walks in]

    Ferris Bueller: Bueller, Ferris Bueller. Do you know how hard it is to have nine sick days at my school in one semester? I can deceive anyone, I’m incredible, even in the worst performance of my career they never doubted it for a second.

    Me: Doc?

    Dr. Emmett Brown: The way I see it, if you’re gonna build a time machine into a car and embark on a suicidal voyage across the stars, why not do it with some style?

    Ferris Bueller: Wait a minute, Doc, are you trying to tell me that if any of us dies we can just go back in time and stop it from happening?

    Dr. Emmett Brown: Precisely.

    Me: Gizmo?

    Gizmo: (mogwai-nese singing)

    Me: A cute little guy like this can turn into a thousand ugly monsters, all we need is a bottle of water and a few hundred after-midnight snacks, of course its hard to really know when midnight is in space…

    Gizmo: Uh-oh.

    Die Hard: Should be handy in a tight spot.

    Me: We’ll be seeing plenty of those. Moving on, Bowie?

    David Bowie: The cold space will make my nipples all pointy, which I’ll use as telescopic antennae to transmit data back to Earth. Plus I brought enough really freaky sequin space suits for you all.

    [Han Solo steps out of the shadows and takes a freaky sequin spacesuit]

    Gizmo: (mogwai-nese laughter)

    Han Solo: Laugh it up, fuzzball.

    Me: Why don’t you tell us what you bring Solo?

    Han Solo: I’m captain of the Millennium Falcon. I’ve outrun Imperial starships. Not the local bulk cruisers mind you, I’m talking about the big Corellian ships now. You know, sometimes I amaze even myself.

    Me: So we have the hardened cop on the verge of retirement,the obnoxious, vest wearing kid, the original inventor of time travel,the cute but deadly non-humanoid,the androgynous superstar- you know for the JRPG fans and the charismatic jerk. Seems we have covered all bases. This mission is going to be tough, we won’t all be coming back and it’s possible none of us will.

    Han Solo: I’ve got a bad feeling about this. Attacking this battle station is not my idea of courage. It’s more like, suicide.

    [Docking Bay door opens revealing the Normandy, The meeting room is bathed in white light]

    Gizmo: Bright light. Bright light. [Dives into clothes hamper]

    Dr. Emmett Brown: Great Scott!

    Ferris Bueller: Life moves pretty fast. You don’t stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it. [Pulls on Sunglasses]

    Die Hard: Yippie-ki-yay! [Cocks Shotgun]

    David Bowie: (singing) Oh we can beat them, for ever and ever, then we can be heroes, just for one day.

  • Inspector Gadget – Simply put, the guy has an incredibly wide set of gear that WILL get you out of trouble
    Giant End Game Bowser – Virtually indestructable, but will need backup for encounters with red and green italian plumbers.
    Stephen Hawking – Capable of relating anything to spacetime (sciency type guy, to explain complex situations to the slower teammates).
    Bayonetta – Simply put, there always needs to be a women for Commander Sheppard’s interest. Plus, she can handle herself in any situation.
    Picahachoo – Yellow Stress relief ball. Everyone needs to wind down after the mission. Good for being the ball in: Soccer, Volleyball, dodgeball.
    Michael Atkinson – Diversion for enemies to attack while team reloads/recovers/relocates/etc. Enemies play computer games in their downtime and dislike him and will aim to take him out first.

  • 1) Rorschach – Raging, remote Rorschach wreaks ruin on reprobates with no respect for repercussions. A requisite resource, his roaring rampages rightly reward his crew.

    2) The Doctor – What the Doctor does deserves divine devotion. Deliverance from dire danger, dastardly designs dissolved and Daleks destroyed in the work of a day. Dear Doctor deliver us.

    3) Maxwell (Scribblenauts) – Marvel how Maxwell manages matters. Merciless monsters no misfortune as Maxwell makes miniatures that metamorphose into materiality. Megapnosaurus, Master Chief and Martial Artist all meet in melee for Maxwell.

    4) Christ – Christ cures his compatriots and conciliates conflicts. Chthonic creatures should be concerned – Christ craves their conversion and ceaselessly sermonises until they are complaisant. Christ is cherished by his cabal.

    5) Pikachu – Pikachu’s popularity never perishes. His shocking power pulverises peons and perpetrators alike, while his pernicious passion peculiarly persuades people to part with their pay. Thus Pikachu’s pack attains prosperity.

    6) Samus Aran – Samus’ supple and sinuous physique is the ace up her sleeve as she struggles against space pirates. Never surrendering, Samus will unceasingly support her squad as they seek to strip the stars of sinister forces. Her sexuality supplies her with scores of supporters.

    I’d like to thank my desktop thesaurus and my brain for not melting.

  • 1. Navi: Navi the fairy. Will provide vital information about enemies, will also be an effective decoy due to her habit of shouting “HEY, LISTEN”. After which she will be immediately gunned down by the enemy.

    2. Detritus: Detritus the troll from Terry Pratchett’s “Discworld” series of books. Carries a “crossbow” which is actually a siege ballistae. Extremely effective at demolitions.

    3. Ryu: HADOUKEN!!!!!one11!

    4. Pikachu: The electric Rodent, Pikachu. Will allow the rest of team to let off some steam by punting it when they are agitated. Or stuck on a really difficult stage.

    5. Lord Voldemort: He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named. The generic “angrykid” in the group. He needs more horcruxes. And his death was kinda underwhelming in Harry Potter.

    6. The Arbiter: The Arbiter from Halo 2 and 3. Quite possibly the most awesome character in Halo, kept under the shadow of Masterchief. The Arbiter has come to kick ass and chew some gum. But he can’t chew gum on account of his split jaw. So he will just kick ass instead.

  • 1. Wheres Wally – He has the great ability to stay hidden in large crowds

    2.Ezio Auditoire – I’m sure making doubles of your self with a piece of eden would come in handy

    3.Jar Jar Binks – Would provide an excellent distraction for enemy’s by running around like the worlds biggest gumby

    4.Captain “Soap” Mactavish – He is Scottish come on ?

    5.Tony Stark – Being one of earth’s biggest smart asses and having an ironman suit would be handy in a tense situation

    6.My Mother – Being a short and very aggressive red head has its positives like being able to throw full grown men across a room.

  • Behold, my team of ultimate space adventurers!

    Patrick Stewart – To narrate our adventured in real-time, with his hypnotic bold monotone. Everything would just seem that much more epic. Plus he seems to have some experience with this whole space adventuring thing.

    Five-star General Zapp Brannigan – If there’s an alien out there he can’t kill, he hasn’t met it and killed it yet. He would also liven up our weekly morale-boosting karaoke nights.

    Alex Rogan (The Last Starfighter) – Spent all his time playing video games, and still managed to save the universe AND get the girl. Truly an inspiration to us all. Plus his friend has a nifty “space car” for convenient inter-planetary travel, with much easier parking.

    Lando Calrissian – Ladies man and snappy dresser. Who else can pull off the half-cape look with such style? And who better to go cruising alien bars and clubs with to pick-up, err… “information”?

    R2-D2 – Great for maintenance/repair, weapon storage, computer hacking, as well as a handy entertainment solution. I’m sure there’d be an HDMI port on the little guy somewhere. Not to mention his demonstrated ability to serve drinks. Handy for the afore mentioned karaoke nights.

    Jar Jar Binks – Just so I could flush him out of on air-lock, once and for all. Or maybe use him for target practice.

  • As a soldier I would recruit the following.

    1: Starkiller. (Force Unleashed)
    Many would choose Luke or Vader but which of them has pulled a Star Destroyer into a planet?
    Having had much experience in traveling the galaxy he would adapt quickly to all kinds of strange environments and fighting unique enemies.
    His light-saber skills and force intuition enable him to stand toe to toe with gun wielding foes while his force powers would make the hardest of biotics tremble.

    2: Itchy. (Simpsons – Itchy and Scratchy)
    When the chips are down and the violence is getting ugly you need someone you know won’t get squeamish, someone who can think outside the box when it comes to killing the enemy.
    They may be prepared for a straight up gun battle but when one of their number finds themselves in tank full of piranha? That’s got to be bad for morale.

    3: Cortana. (Halo Series)
    In an increasingly technologically advanced galaxy you need someone skilled in computer hacking, data decryption and systems infiltration. Having provided such assistance to the MC in the past she would be perfect for disabling security systems, retrieving important data, locating persons and items of interest, providing maps of the local area and other tasks that would sway perhaps not just the battle, but the mission itself in your favor.

    4: Napoleon Bonaparte resurrected as a telepathic shade of blue.
    As a brilliant tactician and military leader his advice would be invaluable for assessing the combat situation on a play by play and overall level, as well as strategic planning before going in.
    As a shade of blue I could paint my gun with him, receiving the needed advice telepathically while cutting down on costs of food and living arrangements and the risk of him vying for the leadership position.

    5: Mary Poppins.
    The need for a squad such as this to travel with speed and flexibility prevents bringing along bulky but often vital equipment.
    Her bottomless bag would enable the team to bring such equipment as mobile gun turrets, spare vehicle parts, extra food and water for extended missions as well as somewhere to put captured prisoners or smuggle goods into restricted zones.
    The ability to fly with just an umbrella would provide great reconnaissance, while her practical, no-nonsense attitude would valuable in decision making.

    6: Sha’ria. (Asari Consort – ME1)
    Not every situation can be resolved favorably with a gunfight – often you need to sway the opinion of a certain individual or convince someone to lend aid to your cause.
    For this Sha’ria would be perfect – her experience in addressing the needs and concerns of individuals from many races and backgrounds would enable her to sway the minds of almost any potential benefactor, while her innate biotic ability would serve her well should diplomacy fail.
    She would also be valuable in resolving any tension and conflict among the crew that may arise on such a long and dangerous mission.

  • Hmm, my political force to tackle the universe.

    1. Lynne Kosky – Former Victorian transport minister, capable of absorbing anything thrown at her she’d be the Tank of the group and right at the end of the game, when you have to make the harrowing decision to kill someone off, she falls on her sword.

    2. Kevin Rudd – The smiling Assassin, able to take out government leaders with ease whilst remaining affable to the public.

    3. Brendan Nelson – Unfortunately Brendan just doesn’t have the staying power of the rest of the team, but he fulfills the “Red Shirt” role ala Star Trek and is always the first to get taken out. He also has the worst armour and weapons.

    4. Peter Costello – The long standing second in command of the group, able to keep the team together as long as the leader still stands. The Medic but witl impressive negotiation bonuses.

    5. Bob Hawke. Every company on their way to war needs the grizzled veteran and Bob covers everything. The everyman, charismatic and aggressive, the man-at-arms. How can you NOT have the man who got a Guiness World Record for beer drinking in the group!

    6. Troy Buswell – The chair-sniffing politician from WA, because every team needs a larrikin to keep the mood light even when hell is breaking all around them.

  • Iron Maiden. Nowhere else can you find a team of 6 full of such awesomeness.

    Plus they can call on Eddie – need I say more?

  • 1) Someone with a spaceship, An adventure in space needs one of these, always handy to have a friend with a low self esteem finally gets his day of praise and attention… Til he is over looked for his ship.

    2) Someone who can maintain the ship, Gotta keep it in good condition with all the alien ass we’re gonna blast. Plus I don’t think auto insurance covers these sorts of things. A southern mechanic stereotype is recommended.

    3) A expert in si-fi weaponry, This guy probably spent his whole life studying weapons based on shows like star trek and firefly. Examined Alien behavior and weaknesses but best of all, He knows what makes baddies go off in the best boom!

    4) A comedic robot sidekick. Not just any comedic robot sidekick, but a comedic robot sidekick with MASSIVE LASER CANNONS! and the comedic timing to bring any high end situation into a calm sitcom like atmosphere.

    5) A trigger happy psycho, Everybody loves psychos with their cynical views on life but with their morbid optimistic attitude they’re always fun to have around. And as our robot lowers the tension in high end situations. This guy raises it in low end situations!

    6) The complete box set to “sex in the city”, “Will and Grace” and “friends”, To distract my GF so she doesn’t notice I left to get milk 5 months ago.

  • 1. Obama (He will introduce new legislations to ban elites from entering Team Obama’s land!)

    2. Prince William (The King)

    3. Lionel Messi (Will kick soccer balls at elites.

    4. Master Chief (Chief will spartan laser their heads!)

    5. Lady Gaga (The Beauty)

    6. Michael Atkinson (The Sacrifice)

  • I vote for an elite team of historical figures

    1. Jim Caviziel (Jesus Chirst)
    2. Brad Pit (Achilles)
    3. Kevin Costner(Robin Hood)
    4. Gerald Butler (Leonidas)
    5. Colin Firth (Alexander the Great)
    6. Clive Owen (King Arthur)

  • 1. My Wife – Because she is always complaining we need to get out more, so a nice trip around a distant universe would cover me for the foreseeable future (however short that may be), plus she is currently unemployed and really needs something to do.
    2. My best mate – Because I need someone to blame when it all goes to shit
    3. A trained pet Monkey – Monkeys make EVERYTHING better, even the end of the universe. Why do I need 2 monkeys I hear you say? well as opposed to “Best Mate” this pet monkey will be trained!
    4. A Screaming Kid – Nothing distracts evil sentient robot/aliens like a screaming child, its like a flash bang that keeps on banging. Plus we wont have time for sleep anyway.
    5. Mother in Law – She goes where screaming children go. It “MAY” allow for some sleep, the promise of more screaming children should work! Plus she IS LETHAL with a sewing needle
    6. Seeing as how we “might” need someone to actually “do” something, i say Kevin Rudd, based on what he’s done for Australia just imagine what he’d do for the whole universe.

  • 1. Chris Tucker (Article Image, Rush Hour) Pros – Doubles as comic relief and token black guy.
    Cons – His voice.

    2. 21 (Venture Bros.) Pros – Combination of invincible and expendable.
    Cons – Unhealthy attachment to the skull of 24.

    3. The Doctor (Doctor Who) Pros – Pretty much immortal. Sonic screwdriver.
    Cons – Most of the people he has met have ended up dead.

    4. Bender (Futurama) Pros – I hear he’s the greatest. Kleptomaniac
    Cons – Alcoholic, kelptomaniac. Tendency to “cheese it”.

    5. Kaylee (Firefly) Pros – Knowledge of machines allows her to identify weaknessess in the Geth. Seems like she’d be up for it.
    Cons – Terrible in a fight. Tetchy.

    6. Samuel L. Jackson (Somewhere in America) Pros – He’s in everything.
    Cons – Not an optional member of the team, he’s in everything.

  • 1. Steven Segal (Brute Force – martial arts expert)
    2. Sil – Species (Sexy Alien – that can fight)
    3. Bear Gryll – Man vs Wild (Survival – Maps etc)
    4. Angela Lansbury – Murder she wrote (detective and journal entries)
    5. Tom Selleck as Magnum PI (the ‘tache’ can help in negotiations)
    6. Worlds Strongest Man Winner – Pack Mule

  • 1. Michael Bluth
    2. George Michael Bluth
    3. GOB
    4. Tobias “Analrapist” Funke
    5. Baby Buster
    6. Carl Weathers

  • 1. Batman – becuase he batman
    2.Spider-man – he is a teenager with powers
    3. Deadpool – he is a smart ass and you always need one of them
    4. Kratos – if anyone steps out of line he will rip them apart
    5. Old Snake – he can still kick ass even if he old as hell.
    6.Bayonetta – you need a chick

  • A JVC RV-NB50 Kaboom Speaker
    24m of copper wire
    Jimi Hendrix
    A 24V battery
    A remote control car
    Pvt. Roycewicz, armed with a 1940s flamethrower.

  • 1. Where’s Wally – he’s super good @ hiding, so need him for stealth!
    2. Wario – Toxic gas for all occasions
    3. War from Darksiders – every trip needs someone with a beaming personality and good sense of humour, am i RIGHT?!?! (sarcasm not included)
    4. Chloe from Uncharted 2 to keep the boys morale up
    5. Whoever made this clip: – because every mission needs someone with such a genius/sick mind
    6. Token from South Park – on a dangerous mission where death is possible, and knowing all that we do from survival horror features need I elaborate why?

  • How about?

    Babble – the baby of the team.
    Defamer – Beware the snide comeback
    Gizmodo – Tech Support
    Kotaku – Trusty Sidekick
    Lifehacker – One ingenious solution coming up!
    Sugar – There’s always a hot babe on the team right?

  • My team would consist entirely of buff men. (Or buff men in training.) This will help me get over the emotional scarring I recieved from Mass Effect 1, where my (I thought) heterosexual, female Shepherd had lesbian sex without my permission, when talking to the Consort. I mean, one minute we’re talking, and the next, wham, we’re doing it in cut scene. And when I played with a male Shepherd, there was unfortunately no reciprocal hot male/male scenes available. I was miffed that Bioware catered to the fantasies of its male/lesbian player demographic, but didn’t do anything for women (or gay dudes). Choosing between Kaidan, and a stupid Asari is not a choice. Even if Kaidan was awesome.

    One guy is not a choice. So here’s six to choose from:

    1) An alien of the, uh, Farari, species. These look like green, totally buff men. They’re like the Asari, but they’re men. Or like men. And hotter. Y’know.
    2) Kaidan. He had a lovely, gravelly voice.
    3) Carth. From Knights of the Old Republic 1. He had a lovely, gravelly voice.
    4) Raphael Sbarge. He has a lovely, gravelly voice.
    5) Sephiroth. The first of all my video game crushes. So beautiful and yet so tormented. Hug.
    6) My ex-boyfriend. The World of Warcraft addict, who couldn’t make dinner dates because of his emotional over -committment to his guild. He needs to get into shape and there’s nothing like saving the universe to help him with that. He can carry all the luggage.

  • 1) 3 Eyed Alien from Toy Story -Claw Worshipers. need someone with a little faith.
    2) Rhino the Hamster from bolt – Stealth specialist.
    3) ViVi – Behind the lines long distance fire power
    4) Bruce Willis – Tactician/Firepower
    5) Warhammer Orc Nob – Tank
    6) Alex Vaynce – Good with electronics, and Gorgeous to look at. You need a girl for the romance achievement right?

  • My selections are dedicated to my fellow countrymen who are under constant threat of repatriation by over-enthusiastic Aussies

    1) Russell Crowe – Could win the war singlehandedly armed with only a phone.
    2) Phar Lap – Fastest kiwi ever born, to save me walking everywhere.
    3) Crowded House – For their weather controlling abilities as well as to provide entertainment.
    4) Hiphopopotamus – For his bottomless lyrics, sure to help out in tricky diplomatic situations.
    5) Rhymenoceros – For his experience with gang warfare from his time in the “Tough Bretts”.
    6) Anna Paquin – Because otherwise, to quote FotC, there are “too many d*cks on the dancefloor”.

  • Roland Deschain – This gunslinger (the protagonist of Stephen King’s the Dark Tower series) has had experience at
    fighting dangerous and often unknown enemies. Armed with his twin revolvers and a psuedo-magical skill set that
    all heighten his fearsome combat capabilities (such as inhuman firing speed and superhuman reflexes and accuracy)
    this man is a no-brainer for the situations where diplomacy fails and a “shoot first, ask questions later”
    attitude is needed. In additon to this, this man has an extraordinary ability to survive – he’s lived through a
    tsunami of bullets, fires, plagues, even the “world moving on” (a sort of slow apocalypse that turns the world into
    a desolate wasteland). He even slaughtered a whole town on his way to the titular Dark Tower. Oh, and did I mention
    he pursued his ancient nemesis, Walter o’Dim, for over twenty years through a desert?

    Sherlock Holmes – Possibly the greatest detective ever, Sherlock Holmes’s incredible observation, deduction and
    overall thirst for mystery and intrigue make him a much-needed addition to Commander Shepard’s elite team. Holmes’s
    profound capbility to logically connect point A to B and then correctly deduce that if A is connected to B, then
    C happened would be a invaluable asset to Commander Shepard as he traversed the galaxy, solving crimes and mysteries.
    Sherlock Holmes is no lightweight when it comes to combat, either – he is well-versed in pistols, fencing, chemistry
    and other useful subjects. His inclusion to this team is “Elementary, my dear Watson (or Shepard).”

    Confucius – A Chinese philosopher and thinker, the wise elder that is Confucius would present an interesting
    addition to the team. Confucius is knowledge on my aspects of the human life and surrounding enviroment,
    including politics, ethics, beliefs and even his ideals on the afterlife. His teachings and influence
    would engender understanding, tolerance and compassion within Commander Shepard’s squad, something that
    could very well prevent any number of needless bloodshed. Even such hot-tempered species such as the krogan could
    learn something from this man.

    Charles Bishop Weyland – The longstanding trope of an evil megacorporation with a diabolical man at the helm seems
    to never go out of fashion, and Charles Weyland is another of these. However, this man is no ordinary fiend – he already has
    experience with aliens. Weyland’s singleminded nature and willingness to get the job done (after all, he was willing to
    order his subordinates to impregnate a young girl and a woman with horrific Xenomorph embryo’s in an effort to gain subjects
    with which to breed a biological weapon) would certainly come in handy when fighting the Collectors and Reapers.
    Not only does he already have experience with aliens, the Weyland-Yutani corporation is also a longrunning space exploration
    company – something that will no doubt prove beneficial to Shepard and his marauding compatriots.

    Marie Curie – A famous Polish and French physicist and chemist, Marie Curie would be the resident scientist in
    Shepard’s crew. Curie’s experiements with radioactive substances and radioactivity in general (indeed, she even coined the term)
    would be a powerful advantage when traversing hazardous planets or facing foes using such powers. Her experience with handling new
    and foreign materials would also aid Shepard’s team in analysing and protecting themselves from any new weapons foes such as the Collectors
    or gethmight wield (that used these materials). With her help, substances that were once thought harmful or fatal to different
    species would have countermeasures developed.

    King Arthur – Long considered to be the greatest figure of any legend or story, King Arthur was said to have been the commander of
    the defense of Britain against the Saxon invaders in the early 6th Century. Arthur, accompanied by his famous sword Excalibur
    would be able to instil courage, valour and honor in his allies. Leading the charge in any battle, not even a Reaper
    could hope to stand against Arthur’s legendary power and the evil-vanquishing properties of Excalibur. No doubt his
    powerful allies such as Merlin and the Knights of the Round Table would also aid him as he charges across the galaxies. (note:
    keep away from anyone called Mordred).

  • Tom Selleck – Large handguns and even larger moustaches, brings the manliness up to an all new level
    Tom Clancy – A mind that solidly understands the fundamentals of war and politics, and more importantly how they interact will no doubt come in useful on a galactic political stage
    Tom Cruise – The perfect mix of Action and Science Fiction (See the Mission Impossible franchise and various Scientology related rants respectively)
    Tom Jones – A little accompanying music never hurts during the action (See Mars Attacks!)
    Tom Sawyer – To help you find the joy in the little things along the way
    Tom Hanks – If he can find anthropomorphic company in a Volleyball with a hand print then surely it will make the leap to finding company in your AI compadres that much easier.

  • 1. Uranium – fuel and weapons.
    2. Helium – light entertainment (heh).
    3. Oxygen – a must.
    4. Hydrogen – for combining with the oxygen.
    5. Neon – to create light.
    6. Arsenic – for poisoning enemies.

  • to kill an army of robots one needs an army of robots.

    Optimus Prime (old prime)
    Terminator (Arnie variant)
    a sex-bot (it is mass effect remember)
    the Macross (these guys need a ship to cruise around in and the macross transforms into a giant robot like thing)

  • 1. Humphrey B Bear – Bear with no pants whats not to like.
    2. Chrisco Hamper – My team will get hungry on our adventures.
    3. ING bank account – Need to buy ammo and guns so need to have a good savings account.
    4. Huey – from hueys cooking adventures – he’s already a good adventurer and he can cook my food from the hamper.
    5. Soap (from Modern Warfare 2) – Good with Guns and I can make jokes about soap on a rope.
    6. House – House will be my medic.

  • Detective Isaac Washington (House of the Dead: Overkill) – Every group engaging in dangerous missions needs an angry black man saying ‘mutha fucka’ at every given opportunity.

    Jake the Muss: His warrior days may be once gone, but feed him enough alcohol and he’ll go berserk. He’ll be most effective if the enemy deny any requests for eggs.

    Samus Aran: Is great at killing aliens, flying spaceships, and if we complete the mission quick enough, she’ll take her suit off.

    Machete (Danny Trejo) – Mexican day labourer, all day badass. Can kill without regard, and can fix all technical issues the ship may encounter. Definitely not the sort of Mexican the enemy will want fuck with!

    Dr Roxo (Metalocalypse) He does cocaine!… and will make the enemy feel uncomfortable in his presence.

    Tiger Woods – Someone needs to relieve the sexual tension in the crew.

  • 1) Sausages
    2) Beer
    3) BBQ
    4) TV playing some sort of sports (doesnt matter)
    5) Normandy floating through space
    6) A chair to sit back and watch and watch the alliance do the work, because Shepard is still tired from Mass Effect 1

  • i’d just take 6 reapers from mass effect. It took the entire human army to take down 1 reaper imagine 6 reapers? i have a good point don’t i…

    but one of the reapers names would have to be jim. i don’t know why, but i just want a giant ancient alien creature named jim.

  • 1. A Level 80 Death Knight in Full PVP Gear, cause they’re OP

    2. Sonic the Hedgehog – because as far as I’m concerned, him and he’s games are dying anyway. A suicide mission might be the right career move.

    3. Mario – because after the 2D stint in New super mario bros, it’s time to get some 3D action again. Plus alot of games reference him anyway.

    4. Barack Obama – because everyone believes he can save our planet, so why not put more on the plate? Plus he can talk like a diplomatic mofo, which is good for the conversing and decisions in Mass Effect 2.

    5. A terrorist – because obviously if you need to escape the best way to buy some time is to blow something up… You might need to take a few.

    6. David Wildgoose – because he can review the situation, then rate everyone’s performance after the battle. Also it’s the most interesting last name I’ve seen, try and say it 10 times really quick.

  • 1. My Holographic Charizard
    2. Vault Boy
    3. Ranier Wolfcastle (Because guns don’t kill people, he does)
    4. Master Chief (because eh kills aliens and dosen’t afraid of anything)
    5. Goku (Obligatory Over 9000 reference)
    6. Your Mother…and her mother 😛

  • 1.Jack Bauer, He survived 8 seasons of 24 FTW, well not 8 yet, but I’m sure he will still be alive by the time season 8 ends. This guy certainly will survives dangerous mission by himself.

    2.Doraemon, well this robot has certainly finished a lot of missions in doraemon adventure with his magic pocket haha

    3.Barrack Obama, he is the president of the United States, who can top that? secret service will protect him in any dangerous mission ftw

    4.Cloud Strife, because he is the money tree of square-enix, wayyy to many ff 7 products in the market, and he can slice all dangerous enemy he face.

    5.Cat woman, will seduce any enemies she face.

    6.Ironman, well no further explanation needed, his rocket and iron fist will pawn any enemy.

  • 1. Darth Vader : Intimidation value.

    2. Superman : Basically invincible

    3. Sherlock Holmes : High level intelligence

    4. Agent 47 aka Hitman : Can perform assassinations

    5. Batman : Gadgets and $$$$$

    6. Gordon Freeman : He can do a lot with a crowbar.

  • 1. Jessica Alba – sexy Brunette
    2. Scarlett Johansen – sexy Blonde
    3. Christina Hendricks – sexy Redhead
    4. Chef (Southpark) – Music (Setting the scene)
    5. Jamie Oliver – Cook
    6. Chuck Norris – Killing people

    As we all know Chuck Norris > all so while he is doing his thing I can kick back with good food, good tunes and some pretty ladies. This is Mass Effect after all so it is a sure thing too.

  • 1 Crates – good things are stored in crates
    2 Invisible walls – just when the enemy thought they could fit through/over that gap
    3 3rd person camera angle – enemy won’t see you hiding behind those crates
    4 A Princess – eye candy and love interest
    5 A Mushroom – preferebly one twice the normal size of a human, or a magic one.
    6 Windows ME- will crash any computer system without predjudice

  • 1. Chuck Norris’s beard (with hidden third fist of Chuck Norris) – I expect that everyone will nominate Chuck Norris himself to help save the galaxy, but it’s a well known fact that his beard alone would be capable for the job.

    2. Jack O’Neil – Everyone needs a wisecracking General for when the going gets tough.

    3. Starbuck (BSG Reboot) – I’ll need an ace pilot to help me save the galaxy, it’s a bonus that she’s smokin’ hot!

    4. Someone who is good at conversation – Those space elevators can be awkward as hell!

    5. A clean pair of undies – Mum said never leave home without them!

    6. A D20 Die – That’s just how my squad rolls!

  • 1) Blinky
    2) Pinky
    3) Inky
    4) Clyde

    The four ghosts from Pacman, as no matter what they always get their enemy/pacman eventually.

    5) Yeti (from skifree – for the same reason above)
    6) Goomba (wearing a red shirt) as you always need a team member to sacrifice.

  • 1. Indiana Jones: You might say Indiana Jones is out of his time and place if we hurl him into the world of Mass Effect. I say that you have no idea how effective a whip and a charming grin are until the exact moment you regret not having them. He’s cunning, has a PhD, and can survive nuclear explosions by hiding in everyday household appliances.

    2. Han Solo: An experienced space pilot, smuggler and handy in a bar fight. You can’t not have this guy on your side. Sure he doesn’t go in for hokey religions and prefers a good blaster at his side than faith in an all-powerful, but that’s the attitude that scored him the damn princess.

    3. Rick Deckard: You want to find the Reapers, this is your guy. You want to find anything, this is your guy. He takes on the things specifically designed to kill him, so anything with a secondary purpose to that doesn’t stand a chance. Also, the chances of him turning out to be a Reaper at the end are pretty small.

    4. Jack Ryan: Whether it’s accidentally defending the British Royal Family from terrorists or fighting Colombian drug cartels, here’s a man who can do anything and add drama to any scene. ANY scene. If Jack Ryan is in the room, you’re probably not meant to be.

    5. Jack Stanfield: The best thing about computer security guys is that they know how to counter computer security too. No lockbox in the world of Mass Effect will be safe with thiss guy on your wing. Did your hard drive just go quiet whileyou were reading this? It’s not idle. It’s scared.

    6. Harrison Ford: Motion-capture modelling.

  • 1. The guy who lives around the corner and throws his leftovers at passers by – He clearly has alot of pent up rage and would be an excellent soldier.

    2. Colonel Sanders – we need to eat whilst on various missions….

    3. Mum…who the hell else will tuck me in at night 😀

    4. Jesus – would definately use his awesome magic skills to teleport us out of sticky situations

    5. Brucie (from GTA 4) – when ever the team needs an ultra masculine pep talk to get the blood pumping…APLHA!

    6. A poster of Liz Hurley in her prime…you know…for all those sleepless nights and stuff…

  • 1)Neil Patrick Harris. 2)Pele. 3)Lloyd Dobler. 4)Atticus Finch. 5)Philip Pirrip aka Pip (John Mills version). 6)Tintin. For substitutes I would have Asterix and Obelix, and Maggie Gyllenhaal, Zooey Deschanel and Emily Blunt for 3-person cheersquad.

  • 1. The Star Wars kid. Head of security. ‘cos we’re gonna need someone who can kick ass.
    2. Jamie Oliver. Chef. I’m sure he can cook up something from the exotic creatures we kill. If the creature is hungry I’d happily feed it Jamie Oliver.
    3. Tom Tom. Navigator. What could go wrong?
    4. Dr Suess. In case someone gets hurt. Oh wait – is he a real doctor?
    5. Groundskeeper Willy. Janitor. Every ship needs at least one janitor and one angry Scottish man, two for one!
    6. Jones – The cat from Aliens. We’re gonna need all the luck we can get, and he was lucky right?

  • 1.starwars ep1
    2.starwars ep2
    3.starwars ep3
    4.starwars ep4
    5.starwars ep5
    6.starwars ep6

    Ok just the old movies and chuck in 3 knights of the old republic games

  • 1) George Bush – (as the read shirt Star Trek Guy) you can never have enough cannon fodder 🙂
    2) Arnold Schwarznegger – Used as big distraction and can confuse people with this Californgerman polticial double speak.
    3) Clint Eastwood – when all else fails, just squint !!!
    4) ALF – You will need a fuzzy Alien Life Form to communicate with all the other weirdos.
    5) Jackie Chan – for when it the action gets up close and slap stick
    6) Chuck Norris – nohting beats the Chuck !!!

  • 1. A Navi from avatar
    2. David wildgoose- I hear he is good with a firearm.
    3. An Actavision employee- if they can’t phisically kill them then they can destroy their hopes and dreams (which is the same thing right?
    4. A woman- for making great sammmiches
    5. An American- so that he won’t ruin Aussie servers anymore with his high ping game! Grrr
    6. And ofcourse my friend- who is awesome at halo, and I heard space and halo are the exact same

  • My team will be taking a different approach to attack:

    Fat Bastard “get in my belly” and 5 Oompa loompas as an energy soure

  • Genghis Khan – You’ve seen Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure, you know how RAD he is…

    Gordon Freeman – ’nuff said

    Zapp Brannigan – While providing no actual help in a battle or investigations, if we were to lose a fight or fail a mission, Zapp can make it look like we won in a bizarre and convoluted fashion.

    Adam Savage – See below

    Jamie Hyneman – The Mythbusters team would be a source of both comedy and bizarre, dangerous weapons. They could also be used to test if plot-points or alien tech/devices actually work or make sense and change the plot depending on the outcome.

    The Giant Squid from Watchmen – Crazy psych powers, can take a lot of damage, could carry a lot.

  • In times of war it is often difficult to ask people to possibly sacrifice their lives for a noble cause. To alleviate this problem I like a good government will incoporate the

    “Draft System”

    Six unlucky suckers who’s number is up will get to accompany me.

    Propaganda is essential for this to work and many levels of government will get involved to keep the peace and good news flowing.

  • 1. A George Foreman Grill – They have successfully invaded just about every kitchen on Earth and should make the task of overcoming enemy planets that much easier.
    2. The Eiffel Tower – because it’s been stuck in the same place for a long time and deserves a holiday.
    3. Ray Martin’s Hair – As Ray proved over his career, his hair helmet is impervious to all forms of attack. We all want to be there the old philosophical question, ‘What happens when an irresistible force meets an immovable object?’ is answered.
    4. An X-Box 360 – It is customary on many alien planets to exchange three red rings at wedding ceremonies.
    5. Pluto – Since losing its status as a planet Pluto feels it has nothing to loose, which is a great quality to exploit when facing interplanetary conflict.
    6. My Right Shoe – It’s a lot tighter than my left shoe and should make better decisions when buying and selling squad equipment.

  • 1. my mum- She can cook up a feast for a king, she can literally bite glass and power up to her fists of furry, Don’t underestimate her coz just a click of your fingers and pow! your gone

    2. Chuck Norris- All those sayings about him are true, NUFF said

    3. Saxton Hale- The Australian’s Chuck Norris from TF2. Owner of the multi billion corperation Man Co., He can research new weapons and devices to take down the enemy

    4. MacGyver- He can make a device from any household items, In a cell ? No problem, he can help the team break out.

    5. Captain Underpants- provides clean undies for the team and attacks enemies with undies

    6. Seinfield- Provides laughter and humour for the team and can make enemies die laughing

    With these team members I can OWN anyone who stands in our way. Taking us on will be suicide

  • 1. A turtle.
    2. Another turtle.
    3. A cat.
    4. A piece of toast.
    5. Butter
    6. Duct tape.

    It is a well known fact that once a turtle is on its back, it cannot get up again. To solve this, I would duct tape the two turtles together, back to back. In this configuration, they would be unstoppable.

    It is also well know that a cat always lands feet first, and toast always lands butter side down. With this in mind, a similar scenario to the afore-mentioned turtles plays out. I butter the toast, and duct tape it to the cats back, butter side up. Combined, these two forces will create something unnatural, and totally invincible.

    With these six items combined, I would then duct tape the whole thing together. With the newly-created Caturtletoast, it would be almost too easy to rule the galaxy.

  • Hmm, assembing a new elite team eh? Okay, here goes:

    Nico Bellic (GTA4): Jack of all trades. Driver, pilot, soldier and seducer of the wrong women. An ideal addition to the team for his ability to drive the mako over dozens of innocents whilst shooting at the bad guy, after the mission he feels bad about killing the bad guy.

    Dr Byron Orpheus (The Venture Brothers): Eperienced, stylish, comes with his own dramatic sting and thanks to his booming overdramatic voice I’d never be in doubt of when he disagrees with something. Fills the role of biotic and nagging/shouting moral compass. Also has a really hot goth daughter.

    The Emperor (Warhammer 40000): Incredibly powerful and as close to a mortal god as you can get. Special powers include the creation of an army of near unstoppable superhuman space marines and general arse kicking.

    Alma: What team couldn’t benefit from an incredibly overpowered and exclusively pissed off girl who can kill with a mere thought. With Alma on the left and Subject Zero on the right little would survive (possibly including yourself)

    Dr Beverly Crusher (Star Trek The Next Generation): Every team needs a medic, who better than a hot redhead milf who can confuse the enemy with tap dancing? Just so long as she doesn’t drag her son along…

    Albert (The Magic Pudding): Because sometimes you just need a snack in between killing the bad guys. With such a diverse crew its either an incredibly expensive and tempramental gormet chef or a crewman you can eat, who reforms rapidly and who can taste like anything you fancy. He may not have it in the combat department but there’s not many enemies who wouldn’t do a double take when confronted with a cantankerous grumbling pudding charging at them on spindly little legs.

  • My Ultimate Shepard Squad:

    1. Tamed Sovereign: This guy managed to destroy a bunch of Alliance ships only using lasers from its tentacles, so naturally, he’s gonna be my heavy fire support guy. And since this thing is a true AI, it could be a companion to the Normandy SR-2 on those long, lonely space flights

    2. The Stig (from Top Gear): This guy can probably drive the Mako much better than I can, especially in those sheer cliff hilly parts of the first game (Yea the Mako isn’t making a comeback but still, a good driver is always useful)

    3. Emma Watson: With that look, her charm talent would be maxed out from the beginning of the game. She’d be able to calm down a million angry Wrexs without doing his family armour quest first. And if the need arises, she could probably be Hermione Granger and expelliarmus enemies’ weapons and omni tools and bio-amps, disabling tech, weapons and biotics.

    4. Mewtwo: The Ultimate, Kickass, Unbeatable Adept. Need I Say More?

    5. John Rambo (Before he got old :P): In those encounters to jungle type planets, this guy would be very useful. Even in city type situations, this guy would still be very useful, as he seems immortal, probably using continuous immunity with Fitness talent on max. He’ll soak up all the damage.

    6. Sheldon Cooper (From Big Bang Theory): Scientist on board, possibly accompanied by engineer Professor Frink (From Simpsons) to help me research new armour, weapons and upgrade my Normandy SR-2. Furthermore, Sheldon’s lack of understanding of everyday interactions will provide more humour than Liara’s lack of understanding of humans.

  • 1: Green Ranger
    2: Pink Ranger
    3: White Ranger
    4: Red Ranger
    5: Black Ranger
    6: A mutant formed by combined all (I mean all) rangers similar to a katamari ball of screaming death

  • 1. Zapp Brannigan (Futurama) – Charm and Seduction is the key to winning the war, and Captain Brannigan has both. Using these two key perks he’ll seduce his way through space, no Woman (or man?) can resist. Especially if we run into giant Amazonian Women.

    2. Johnny 5 (Short Circuit) – He may not be the most advanced robot you’ve ever seen, but by god can he get the job done. And if you piss him off, he will not forget your face.

    3. Egon Spengler (Ghostbusters) – Every team needs a Scientist right? I can always trust Spengler to keep me up to date with the latest technology, whether it be a Proton Pack or PKE Meter.

    4. Turbo-Man (Jingle all the way) – It’s Turbo Time! Using his Turbo Discs and his Jetpack, he’s sure to scare the living daylights out of anyone that stands in our way.

    5. Seymour (Futurama) – When it comes to a Team Pet, It would have to be good old Seymour. He’ll be there all the time, barking out “Walking on Sunshine”, he’ll help us navigate our way through the many planets we visit. And generally just be the most awesome Pet anyone could have.

    6. Serious Sam (Serious Sam) – Move over Shepard, Sam isn’t afraid of anything, we could just set up camp and he’ll be standing hours on end with his Double Barreled Shotgun and Canon.

  • 1.My Girlfriend – She’s HOT

    2.My best mate – We enjoy chugging beer together

    3.My dad – He has answers to EVERYTHING

    4.My mum – She’s like, psychic sometimes…

    5.My good uncle – He makes Macgyver look uneducated

    6.Kevin Rudd – I’ll give him the worst armors, just to watch him die over and over.

  • 1. My Mum – to bake cookies and heal the (some of) troops.
    2. Stephen Conroy – the much needed decoy.
    3. Tron Guy – I think he would provide much needed conversation, if not target practice.
    4. Kit – He is a talking car, with AI. Need I say more. Perhaps I do, brmmmmmmmmmm! It’s the transport.
    5. Basil Fawlty – To yell abuse at the enemy. Hehe, he jumps so much when he yells.
    —— Drum Roll ——
    6. William Shatner – Oh, Shatner. I don’t care that you have no hair. You are my dream boat. The man is a genius and god. What can’t he do?

  • Space experience is a necessity.

    1. Spike Spiegel – World class bad-ass.

    2. Malcolm Reynolds – World class bad-ass.

    3. Han Solo – World class bad-ass AND a pilot. With legs that don’t break like wet balsa wood.

    4. River Tam – Agile, deadly. Catchphrase “I can kill you with my brain”.

    5. Dr. Zoidberg – Terrible doctor, but he looks great in my aquarium.

    6. Samus Aran – Paramour: 50G
    Successfully pursue a relationship with a team-mate.

    Because something tells me “pursue a relationship” isn’t Samus inviting me into her quarters for tea and biscuits. Achievement unlocked indeed.

  • 1/2/3. 3 ghosts from the lord of the rings (they cant die)
    4. Anakin Skywalker (he can pilot the ship filled with the ghosts…unless, can ghost fly through space? if so we don’t need him)
    5. myself because my mum says i can be whoever i want to be and do what ever i want to do
    6.a question, ill freeze everyone with the conundrum “how long is a piece of string” lets see you work that one out intergalactical space noobs

  • My six team mates would be…

    The Soldier
    The Pyro
    The Engineer
    The Medic
    The Sniper
    The Spy

    Justifications (not that they need it): a rocket powered offence; fire in zero gravity, how could it possibly go wrong?; never leave home without an engineer, just don’t; the obligatory German accent; a martial arts expert; and what spy? I don’t see any spy.

    The Demo isn’t invited because he lost the war and I wouldn’t let losers on my starship. The Scout and The Heavy are out because they’d always be fighting over food (when they should be killing aliens).

    Oh, and in case you were wondering, they’re all RED; not having any of those pathetic BLU’s on my ship either.

  • 1. Revolver Ocelot, that guys got a billion lives
    2. McGyver, he makes bombs out of coat hangers
    3. Privare Hudson from Aliens, he seems to have a pretty good handle on those portable hand scannners
    4. Tyler Durden from Fight Club, Strength and Conditioning Coach
    5. Keyser Söze, he IS the devil after all
    6. Finally, Anyone from the Cannon Fodder game, because “war has never been so much fun”

    PS. I wouldnt choose Chuck Norris or Leeroy Jethro Gibbs because they’d finish the battle too quickly, and that would be no fun at all

  • My crack team consists of…

    Baldwin P. “Bulletproof” Vess (Earth): commander in chief of C.O.P.S. (Central Organization of Police Specialists). He is a great detective and a resourceful problem solver. His cybernetic chest armour also has the ability to hack computers and machines.

    Marshall Bravestarr (Fire): From the planet New Texas, Marshall Bravestarr has the powers of eyes of the hawk, ears of the wolf, strength of the bear and speed of the puma.

    Bluegrass (Wind): Partly metal, partly real, He is second in command of the Silver hawks. He is a great pilot, cowboy and musician. Plus his sonic guitar is a deadly weapon.

    Panthro (Water): Engineer extraordinaire and a skilled martial artist wielding fire and ice breathing nun-chucks. He also built the thunder tank and designed the Cats Lair.

    Prince Adam of Eternia (Heart) : While he appears a mild mannered aristocrat if he holds aloft his magic sword and says the magic words “I have the power!” he becomes He-man, master swordsman and “The Most Powerful Man In The Universe”. Also having a Battle Cat is often handy and he can keep Panthro from feeling home sick.

    And finally

    Captain Planet: He is a hero and he is going to take pollution down to zero! Controlling the very forces of nature he has immense power, and he helps clean up the environment at the same time. While he is not always present the other 5 members carry the elemental rings that contain his essence. “The Power is yours!”

  • 1. Po (Tellytubbies) – every squad needs a female and this one operates a scooter too.. yay!
    2. Rat in a Hat(Bananas in Pyjamas) – Superior Mercantile and speech-craft skills
    3. Humphrey Bear – the muscle of this operation
    4. Barney the Dinosaur – you said we can bring Dinosaurs right??? he can colour co-ordinate with Tinky Winky too 🙂
    5. King Mickey the Mouse – overall team leader and apparently he weilds a keyblade these days too? can come in handy 😉
    6. Noo Noo the Vacuum Cleaner(Tellytubbies) somebody needs to clean this mess up right?

  • Jackie Chan – The man has dislocated his pelvis and broken his fingers, toes, nose, both cheekbones, hips, sternum, neck, ankle and ribs, and he still is able to fight.

    Bayonetta – Cos let’s face who wouldn’t want a sultry witch angel hunter who can summon demons at will and shoot bullets/rockets from her feet!

    Hael – My best friend’s WoW human priest, she may be old, she may be unattractive, but it is the love she gives that is invaluable to the team…and her heals, especially her heals…healbot.

    Deckard Cain – No more lugging around scrolls of identify.

    B.O.B. (From Monster’s vs Aliens) – Indestructible, able to eat anything, good natured and friendly and just so damn funny.

    Genie (From Aladdin) – Voiced by Robbie Willams, not only will B.O.B. and Genie provide comedy relief but they can lure enemies by their lack of skills and pawn them.

  • To succeed in the most dangerous mission, I’ll need:

    1.A positive can-do attitude
    2.My wits about me
    3.The ability to work well with others
    6.Strong leadership characteristics

  • Seems like most people has got it all wrong here. This is of course the perfect draft for the mission:

    Alpha) Gasch – Someone has to be team leader!

    Alpha-One) Chuck Norris – The only one actually needed for this mission. Being a top notch team leader as I am, I will probably exploit his talents for basically everything on this mission while me and the rest of team ‘explores emotions & intimacy’ and sips White Russians. We will probably make fun of Chuck by making up new ‘Chuck Norris’-jokes when it gets really bored.

    Alpha-Two) Angelina Jolie – We all know that this girl probably could kick Chuck Norris ass if she wanted to. (Not that we would tell Norris that, might hurt his self-esteem)

    Alpha-Three) Kate Beckinsale – Who else to bring if the mission includes Vampires, Werewolves or Arctic scenery?

    Alpha-Four) Keira Knightley – A multitude of skills; knows how to look sexy in 17th Century dresses as well as 11th Century combat outfits. Knows how to sail, use a sword, a use bow… the list just continues, but on this mission I am happy if she offers a smile! 😛

    Alpha-Five) Halle Berry – Who would deny a lovely Bond chick like this with her vicious skills. If nothing else, I heard she does killer Margaritas!

    Alpha-Six) Megan Fox – What would a mission like this be without everyones favorite Ms. Fox?

    See how easy it is? I know my mission will succeed compared to the rest of the lame suggestions in this competition…


  • Hmm this game looks pretty interesting. And here we go.

    1)Arnold Schwarzenegger
    3)Solid Snake
    4)Samus Aran
    5)Mario Mario
    6)The guy from the crow.

  • 1. That fat spikey goomba lady from the live action super mario bros movie. Her spikes and looks would make her pretty immune to attack.

    2. David from david and goliath. With a sniper rifle.

    3. David Doe , so like they could be double david damage, but also for his political/negotiation up/down menu chat system skills.

    4. Xavier from xmen. He could do all those magical *cough cough* biotron attacks.

    5. Stephan Fry. For his amazing voice. Also he could do more voice acting in games instead of Noland North.

    -annnd 6. a Red Yoshi, because I prefer them in red. Could also use his tounge to mind meld with Xavier, then have some kinda egg laying machine gun attack if he took the right hormones.

  • 1. Black Power Ranger
    2. Red Power Ranger
    3. Green Power Ranger
    4. Blue Power Ranger
    5. Yellow Power Ranger
    6. Pink Power Ranger

    Reason: They’re mighty morphin’

  • My deadly squad of six would consist of:

    1) My wife’s ‘special’ meatloaf – to take out enemies sense of taste.
    2) My gym bag – which should wipe out their ability to smell
    3) Tony Abbott’s budgie smuggler pic’s – which would make anyone gouge their own eyeballs out
    4) A cd of Michael Bolton’s greatest hits – to cause a little bleeding from the ear drums
    5) MC Hammer to make sure any enemy can’t sense their surroundings by touching anything
    6) my dog Cricket… I figure with the enemies senses all but taken care of, the path is open for my beagle to make a meal of them!

  • Stone’s Super Squad:

    R2-D2 (Star Wars) – He is the swiss army knife of android companions, with an electronic beep that can never be angry he’s the perfect artificial life sign to have your back. With a poking device for every occasion an at any cost attitude he’s ideal for any mission.

    Rand al’Thor (Wheel of Time) – Any man prophesied as the Dragon Reborn has to be worth a look when assembling an intergalactic strike force. Burdened with the ability to channel powerful magic and mad enough to use them despite the cost makes him the perfect wild card to have up your sleeve.

    Jamie Oliver (Earth) – The universe is a big place and I’m a meat and three veg type of guy, if anyone can make a delicious morsel out of bugs guts and space turd its this guy. He’ll even befriend the locals and have them over for a dinner party.

    Jennifer Hawkins (Earth) – The reasons are two fold, firstly our Jen only has two flaws a slight wrinkle on her hip and some imaginary cellulite on her thigh so her courage, leadership and decision making under fire must be flawless. The other reason is having a familiar face in the party is always great for introductions to foreign worlds and given young Hawkins was once ‘Miss Universe’ it can only be assumed her features have been on display thought out the cosmos.

    Leeloo (The Fifth Element) – Every group needs a scared, innocent slightly out of sync symbol of light, love and all things above. Even if it is so you can slowly corrupt it. Bundled with the experience of already saving worlds she’ll prop any group of six towards the divine path.

    Box of Mars Bars (Mars, Incorporated) – Every primitive society known to man has gone mad over foreigners and there sugar based treats. Willing to do almost anything for another fix, besides if things go south along the way maybe the candy wrappers will lead any wannabe pursuers to the wrong home world.

  • 1. Bruce Lee – just in case chuck norris got pulled to the dark side

    2. Mario – 1ups and fireballs = all round fun!

    3. Lieutenant Commander Shepard and Mark Vanderloo – The star of the moment, and his modelling alter ego will bring action & pouting for all

    4. Clint Eastwood – if i don’t include him i’ll have to make his day… I really don’t want to make Clint’s day!!!

    5. Link – bonafide resume of most gamefaq character battle wins… Triforce > All

  • My team for the ‘humanity vs. the universe’ mission

    1. Samus Aran – Perfect for the role of soldier. She’s experienced in space travel, has a tragic back story, infused with powerful ancient technology, and she hunts FRIGGIN SPACE PIRATES!! She would blaze across the galaxy, mowing through waves of countless aliens and straight into my heart ….. *sigh*

    2. Solid Snake – An easy pick. He has the genes of the world’s greatest soldier, and is also very experienced in combat. Not to mention he would know all kinds of battle and survival techniques if ever we become separated from civilization. His battle know-how and expertise would be beneficial to the mission, not to mention that his advanced aging gives him motivation to complete the mission task before he runs out of time
    3. Nickola Tesla – Would be perfect for the role of insane/ hyperactive/ bloodthirsty soldier scientist. Lets run through the checklist, shall we?:
    * skilled in many languages, check.
    * A superb genius, check.
    * Batshit crazy, check.
    *Adventures in space?, none…… yet

    4. Dr Gregory House – Crew doctor. He always saves his patients, if he cant save your life then you were probably already in the ground when he got to you. Not to mention his dry, sarcastic wit would no doubt keep me amused in the middle of a firefight.

    5. Google Personified – You said I could have anyone I want, so who else would be better to bring along then Google in human form? Hell, he (or she, I’m not sure what gender a search engine would be) would be able to at a moments notice give you any information from the wide pool of human knowledge. Think about the possibilities, you could be floating through space when all of a sudden a random question pops into your head, ‘what was the name of that guy who played Lando Calrissian?’, and Google would be able to tell you**.
    Not to mention he’d be able to hook you up with pictures and youtube videos during some of the more boring missions.

    6. A Bear – If were going to be in space to represent humanity, then we might as well go all out and send a REAL message to the universe. A message that says “We are mankind, and we take all the deadliness and ferocity of nature and kick that s#@t up to 11!!” So how do we send this message? Two words, CYBORG BEAR.
    Its simple really, we get a bear (any bear, grizzly, panda …its all good), and implant in its brains some microprocessors to give it hyper intelligence (enough to rival university professors). Then all we have to do is mount some guns on its back and give it a british accent and we’ll be set.

    … your move universe

    ** Its Billy Dee Williams

  • 1. Mace Windu – (star wars) Mine’s the lightsaber with bad motherf**ker on it

    2. Rorscach AKA Walter Kovacs (Watchmen) – The Citadel will look up and yell save us and I will whisper “no”

    3. GOD (Bible) – Come on he’s well he’s the greatest fictional character ever

    4. Indiana Jones – ( Raider of the lost ark indiana jones not arthritis Indi) come on he’s awesome just awesome

    5. Blade (blade) The swrods, the guns, the wesley snipes-ness

    6. Marcus Fenix (gears of war – Really any nine foot 500 pound dude would do this guy just happens to have a chainsaw/machine gun

    7. Tyler Durden (fight club) he’d be the best companion ever, really just ever and he’d make all the tough decision for you

    8. Abraham Lincoln – He’s abraham lincoln

    9. Solid Snake – Well he’s snake end of story.

    10.Harry Callahan – U lucky punk?

    The ultimate team ever
    submitted at 11:57

  • If I were to amass a squad to take on the a suicide mission, fraught with danger, to save the galaxy from peril I would not choose assassins, or great warriors, infact i would avoid all intelligent companions as intelligence can lead to many failures including indecisiveness, lack of motivation and betrayal. Therefore my squad would be formed from 6 of the most efficient, useful, multi-purpose and non-intelligent things imaginable.

    1. Swiss Army Knife: A knife, spoon, fork, bottle opener, tweezers, corkscrew, scissors, saw, pliers, file, hook, magnifying glass, fish scaler and key chain, all in one. Perhaps the most useful, multi-purpose tool ever created by the human race, no Suicide mission is complete without one.

    2. A Hover Tank that is also a construction tractor, an amusement park ride, a rocket ship, a school bus, a submarine, a blimp, a snowmobile AND is environmentally friendly fuel efficient: Did i mention the tank is a tank?

    3. A Universal Remote: Allows the user to, from the comfort of their recliner, control the TV, the sound sytem, the Hover Tank, the air-con, the automatic blinds, the sprinkler system, and allows the user to interact with video game consoles with movement based gestures. Also includes a D-Pad…

    4. The D-Pad: The ultimate tool to end any battle, and bring you over the finish line of any mission. Allows the user to call in UAV’s, Care Packages, cancel enemy UAV’s, Sentry Guns, Predator Missles, Precision Airstrikes, Harrier Strikes, Attack Helicopters, Emergency Airdrops, Pave Lows, Stealth Bombers, Chopper Gunners, AC130 Gunships, EMPs and Tactical Nukes. Who thought one button could bring so much pain.

    5. A Blank Space: Can be filled with anything…ANYTHING.

    6. A Splade: To accomadate all your eating needs during the inevitable victory feast!

    By choosing these 6, ultimately efficient, multi-purpose tools to take on my suicide mission I avoid the issue of gaining anyones trust and need only rely on good old fashion ingenuity.

  • God I want to enter right now but I don’t want to go for the regular copy. Around what time does the post get updated? I’m assuming that this is being held from the eastern states.

  • 1. Sun Tzu, because war is war in any milenia and Sunny made it an Art.

    2. Chronos, having the Lord of time and father of the greek gods along means a screw up is not going to happen.

    3. A Special forces soldier, we’ll need a weapons and combat expert; what these guys do best.

    4. Sherlock Holmes, the super sleuth will make solving any mystery a breeze.

    5. Heavy Weapons Guy, your token big/russian/crazed dude.

    6. The Grim Reaper, to clean up afterwards and as backup if all else fails

  • Continuing to base this on countless years watching badass squads go around wrecking -ahem- stuff on film and TV, I’m still going for the the team most likely to stay alive.

    1. John McClane – If someone needs to make the noble sacrifice at the end, John McClane is the gritty veteran who’d do it without anyone ever quite believing he died, even if the last time you saw him was in the middle of an exploding Death Star (which he blew up). Another big bonus is that unlike his action hero peers, John’s sidekicks don’t tend to die.

    2. Audrey Hepburn – Every team needs a charmer, ‘The Face’, the George Clooney. Audrey’s persona is so charming, inoffensive and nice that Godzilla would sit down to tea with her, Bin Laden would offer his chair and she could kick either in the nuts and neither would have the heart to lay a finger on her.

    3. Emma Peel with a fake Russian accent – The sexy female spy in a catsuit, would be as classy as Audrey if not for the fact that every hero in the squad would sprint (not walk!) into Mordor if they thought it’d get inside her seemingly glued-on pants. She knows karate, plays a good second banana (that’s what she said!), she gets the job done and even if she gets captured, won’t die. She may get brainwashed and be an evil dominatrix sure, but nobody minds that since she’ll always snap out of it in the nick of time and then you’ll just have a sexy chick in a corset on your side. Since Audrey has the class covered, the accent will emphasize the sex appeal and make sure all the Boris Badenov’s out there want their Natasha. Everyone falls for the sexy Russian superspy after all, even James Bond, and not even the legendary Bond could get Soviet Agent XXX killed.

    4. Mr. T – Your squad cannot be the most badass without Mr. T. Sure they pretended he was afraid of flying, but even if true the space flight in Mass Effect is more Star Trek than Star Wars, meaning naval battles not dogfights and I pity the fool who thinks Mr. T is afraid of getting wet. His loss to fellow 80s action icon Sylvester Stallone might be seen as a detriment, but Mr. T fights best in a group and even then his record remains even against Sly. Not to mention that for as badass as Rocky and Rambo are, everyone they know ends up dead – Mr Tough keeps his team of Action alive.

    5. Clyde the Orangutan – Every team needs comedy relief, which is a big problem as comedy relief has a tendency to die, this isn’t an issue with Clyde. He’s humanoid enough to kick ass in a fight (and find armor that fits him in the Mass Effect universe) but can also sit pretty in the knowledge that in these tales, nobody will accept the cute pet sidekick dying. New York can be exploded by aliens, millions (and the stubborn but lovable grandfather type) will die but it’s all okay as long as people see the cute pet sidekick survive, this narrative protection extends to Clyde. Anyway, if anything really goes wrong, Clint Eastwood will show up to take the fall and ensure we succeed every which way but loose, any way you can.

    6. Dr. Ian Malcolm – The needed intellectual of the team might seem an ill fitting choice as he died in the Jurassic Park novel, but he proved so popular that the author couldn’t keep him dead. Sherlock Holmes and Doctor Who (kind of) did the same thing sure, but Sherlock would only get involved after one of us was dead and The Doctor would do his best to not be involved at all. Dr. Malcolm does his best work as part of an ensemble, cheats death and will have an absolutely charming double act with Clyde the orangutan. Or perhaps Clyde will just punch him in the face when he does that annoying stuttering because I’m so smart thing, either way a win for the squad.

  • 1. steven irwin (rip) just in case you need to capture that animal
    2 and 3: the conner brothers (boondock saints) for two reason, one they know how to handle themselves and no group of people is complete without some twins
    4. The doc from Back to the Future, just in case you frick up that mission, and wanna do it again at least you have the delorian.
    5. Any of the Jonas brothers…. lets face it, there is always one guy that needs to die, might as well kill two birds with one stone, one less jonas brother is good for the world/galaxy
    6. either Samuel Jackson lets face this one too, he is in everything so i guess that would have to be my sixth guy

  • I know its the next morning, but during my rush to prepare for a 40 degree Big Day Out i ran out of ideas for 5.

    So if its alright with you i would like to replace it with the multi-purpose Shamwow.

    For cleaning up the mess you leave behind.

  • Coletrain (GOW2) ” Oh mommy dont let the bad man hurt us”
    Chucky (Childs Play) Dolly with a knife
    Pandemonium Warden (FFXI) Nuff Said
    Dolph Lundgren (Universal Soldier) Comedic Relief
    Maria Sharapova (Tennis Player) She can scream and they will all fall down)
    Pikachu Nuff said

  • 1. Han Solo (To shoot first)
    2. Captain Kirk (To seduce my green female enemies)
    3. The Terminator (For obvious arese kicking reasons)
    5. Bruce Willis (he always survives)
    6. The Death Star (kind of a last resort)

    I didn’t think any of this through, they were just the first that came to mind.

  • I’d choose six of the champion ear-benders that should stop talking in Video games

    1. The Director (Driver: Ignition)
    2. Otis (Dead Rising)
    3. Michelle (GTA 4)
    4. Rosemary (Metal Gear Solid 2)
    5. Kendra Daniels (Dead space)
    6. The adviser (Theme Park)

  • 1. Pinhead – Hellraiser
    2. Jason Vorhes – Friday the 13th
    3. Freddy Krugger – Nightmare on Elm Street
    4. Michael Myers – Halloween
    5. Pedator – Predator
    6. Alien – Alien

    Well no one would fuck with this team.

    They can get anyone, anywhere, at anytime, even in your dreams.

  • 1- Grommit (Wallace & Grommit series) On demolitions.
    2- Lord of terror: Diablo ( Diablo 1 & 2)
    3- Master chief ( Halo series ) Cause seriously. What can’t he handle?
    4-My Nokia 6300 that sits next to me to this day. It’s been dropped off a roof, into a pool, and almost swallowed by a dog.
    5-Ryu Hayabusa (Ninja gaiden 1 & 2) Scouting/Hacking shizz up.
    6-Son Goku (Dragon ball/Z/Gt) On sayain support.
    Thanks for reading!

  • My Ultimate team

    Sean Connery – Starring as Agent 007
    Roger Moore – Starring as Agent 007
    George Lazenby – Starring as Agent 007
    Timothy Dalton – Starring as Agent 007
    Pierce Brosnan – Starring as Agent 007
    Daniel Craig – Starring as Agent 007

    they can distract the collectors and geth collective with the constant bickering as to who was the better James Bond 🙂

  • 1) The notepad (Scribblenauts). So I can summon a pegasus or kthulu when in a pinch. Maxwell can come with it if he must, but only if he’s wearing the pirate outfit.

    2) George Costanza (Seinfeld). His stinginess will come in handy when buying upgrades, and his complete lack of empathy make him a ruthless killing machine.

    3) Captain Falcon (F-Zero/Super Smash Bros). FALCOOOOON PUNCH!!!

    4) Casey Lynch (Guitar Hero). If all else fails, we can get some Co-op FCs on GH, and she’d probably be pretty hot irl.

    5) The Red Ring of Death (Xbox 360). To be implanted into the Geth.

    6) Navi (Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time). Because heroes always need some kind of annoying, floating guide. LISTEN!

  • 1.The cook from the muppets-the way he beats down that spaghetii would scare anyone off
    2.Satan-obvious really
    3.Spongebob Squarepants-Squidward or anyone can tell you that laugh will drive the worst insane
    4.My wallet-its sheer emptiness wil scare the most hardened foe off
    5.Count chocula-Sucks chocolate what more can you want?
    6.a Super giant robot with laser beam eyes and every weapon possible-naturally this would be the least threatening of the lot but i imagine it would get th job done

  • Number 5 from Short Circuit – recon

    David Attenborough – as negotiator

    Iron Man – when negotiations fail

    yoda (with lightsabers) – If Iron man fails

    She-Ra – Love interest

    Keven Bacon – as Kevin Bacon

  • 1. Carl Johnson – GTA:SA for his unbridled ambition to improve himself and his life, also pretty handy in a fight.

    2. Sgt. Foley – MW2 would be a great tactician to have on hand because of his mad delegation skills.

    3. Cole Train – GoW/GoW2 to be the stereotypical black guy plus he would have this great rapping ability that would stir up the team to fight harder.

    4. Louis – L4D would be the team medic and could provide pills.

    5. Black Dynamite for all purpose ass kicking and ability to detect kung fu treachery.

    6. Kimbo Slice for beard fortitude

  • 1. Bella (from Twilight)
    2. Jar-Jar Binks
    3. Shortround (from Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom)
    4. Ruby Rhod (Chris Tucker’s character from The Fifth Element that runs around screaming like a maniac)
    5. Dobby (that servant elf from Harry Potter)
    6. James Bond, who’ll use the other five as the ultimate distractions to get the job done.

  • 1. jesus- cmon, its jesus. he can do magic! (its a joke, people. dont troll me for it.)
    2. mario- in case the plumbing on the new normandy breaks.
    3. storm- for those vacation days on eden prime, to clear up the weather.
    4. darth vader- do i really need to explain why? hes darth vader. he force chokes people. w007.
    5. chuck norris- see “invincible”, pp. 367, websters unabridged dictionary.
    6. and last but not least, my kitty cat! what, being on a spaceship getsl lonely, and cats are very friendly.

  • The first Mass Effect had the right people for the job, but the sequel is a very different beast:

    1. An Elevator Mechanic – ME2 has no more elevators… I’m guessing they’re broken. Who knows what we’ll find if we fix them.

    2. An Alleyway Gambler – ME2 has no more dice roll-based combat. We haven’t figured out what use it is yet, but it’s an RPG so somebody has to be rolling dice for something.

    3. A Therapist – Shepard’s gone all dark and brooding on us, even resorting to punching nearly every person he has a dialogue with. He needs therapy.

    4. A Bland Human Soldier – ME2’s characters are all really interesting, who’s going to be the throwaway human soldier with no real effect on the plot? I already killed off Alenko.

    5. Reggie Fils-Aime – To help me take breaks from the game every few hours by telling me that some good Wii games are going to come out… sometime?

    6. My Xbox Live Avatar – Seriously, I payed real money to give him N7 armour and he never gets to use it. Starting to feel ripped off…

  • 1. Papa Smurf – From Smurf
    2. Krumm – From Aaahh!!! Real Monsters
    3. Bananaman – From Bananaman
    4. Pink Power Ranger – From Power Rangers
    5. Dave – From Code Monkeys
    6. Gumby – From Gumby Adventures

  • B.A baracus. because he is tough and can fix anyvichael
    Howling mad murdock. he cna fly andthing
    Face man. he can scam anything
    Hanibal. has lots of courage and always has a plan
    Cozmo Kramer. when stuff goes down he never backs down (in reference to scienfield episode where he takes his blood out of the blood bank)
    War machine. (from iron man) he is literally a walking tank than can also fly

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