This Week In… My Poor Wallet – Have Mercy!

This Week In… My Poor Wallet – Have Mercy!

As if our bank balance hasn’t been punished enough, this week heralds the release of another metric buttload of potentially top notch games. Argh! My wallet!

Anno 2070 (PC) What is it? Strategy game I’ve never played, but apparently is quite swell. Should you care? I don’t, but I probably should.

Assassin’s Creed: Revelations (360/PS3/PC) What is it? It’s-a-me! Ezio! Except now I have a beard. Should you care? I love Assassin’s Creed. This should be a humdinger.

Halo: CE Anniversary (360) What is it? A remake of Halo with th eeye-blistering HD vizuallls! Should you care? Tragically this is my most anticipated shooter of the year. What is wrong with me…

L.A. Noire (PC) What is it? Team Bondi’s effort finally makes it to the PC. Should you care? Yeah, I guess. I didn’t like the game, but it was an experience.

LEGO Harry Potter: Years 5-7 (Wii/DS) What is it? You know what this is. Should you care? Expelliarmus.

Medieval Moves (PS3) What is it? A move game about swords and stuff. I’m assuming. Should you care? Nope.

Need for Speed: The Run (360/PS3/PC/Wii/3DS) What is it? New Need for Speed game, blah blah blah. Should you care? I’d wait for the reviews. I have a bad feeling about this one. Hope I’m proved wrong.

Nickelodeon Dance (Wii) What is it? Dora the Explorer? More like Dora the snorer (I’ve always wanted to say/write that). Should you care? No.

Saints Row: The Third (360/PS3/PC) What is it? A game where you can beat people to death with a giant dildo. Should you care? I’ve always been down on the Saints Row franchise, but fans will adore this.

Ultimate Marvel vs. Capcom (360/PS3) What is it? More characters and stuff. Should you care? Meh, very much for fans. Not really for me.


  • Soooo… how many of these will we have comps for 😉 hehe

    Sooo mnay good games – of which none i can actually buy until next year… lammmmee

  • Can’t wait for Assassin’s Creed. I’d be all over L.A. Noire on the PC as well if I hadn’t already played and loved it on the PS3. (Not to mention the down pour of other exceptional games taking priority.)

    • Awww yeah. I’d forgotten when it was coming out so was nice to find out it’s releasing this week. Wouldn’t be quite as excited if it wasn’t looking forward to playing it through with the girlfriend. We’ve played through Reach, ODST and number 3 but it’ll be her first time playing through it from where it all started ^_^

  • Saints row!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Having played it already at a launch event, I can’t wait to sink hours and hours into it!

  • How likely is it that a ‘Complete Edition’ Lego Harry Potter will be released later on combining the two games? The first one was very entertaining, but with all the other games coming out now I think I’d rather wait.

    • Well it all depends on how well the singles sold… i see a lot of the first one on clearance out and about.

      That being said, there is a chance they might bundle them together on 360 and PS3 – but not Wii

      • The LEGO games aren’t blockbuster material, but they are pretty damn popular, especially the Harry Potter ones have done very well.

        I honestly wouldn’t be surprised with a complete pack sometime next year, but I don’t think you will really gain anything from waiting, as there will be no DLC or extras and by that time you will be able to buy both originals for the price of the complete.

        • Yeah that’s what I thought. I guess I was just going for convenience over anything else (I borrowed the first one to play so I’d like to buy both anyway). I’ll just wait and worry about it when I’ve run through my must-play list and/or get a LEGO itch. xD

          Thanks to both of you for replying.

          • I have a 10 year old daughter and our staple play together game is this (1-4) when we have time and we have pirates to follow it up. As a Dad and gamer this works so well being two player and a lot of fun……I also get to geek up my little girl. Mum buys her dresses and I buy her games and comics.

  • “A game where you can beat people to death with a giant dildo.”

    You mean GTA:SA is getting a re-release?

    …. oh, wait… um…nevermind.

  • “Need for Speed: The Run (360/PS3/PC/Wii/3DS)
    What is it? New Need for Speed game, blah blah blah.
    Should you care? I’d wait for the reviews. I have a bad feeling about this one. Hope I’m proved wrong.”
    😐 Did you not play the Demo? Let me rewrite that for you
    “Should you care? Racing down a mountain during an avalanche dodging boulders, racing in a city dodging bullets from a helicopter, some of the most breathtaking environments in a racing game ever. No, you shouldn’t care about that…”

    • Also forgot to mention that NFS: The Run is attempting to have a proper story in a racing game, something that I think is badly needed in racing games. Perhaps I should call it ”Need for Story: The Run’ 😛

      • “Should you care? Racing down a mountain during an avalanche dodging boulders, racing in a city dodging bullets from a helicopter, some of the most breathtaking environments in a racing game ever. No, you shouldn’t care about that…”

        Can I have a go? :p

        The demo also included racing through the desert on a very simplistic track, where nothing of interest happens at all, starting in 180th, my only task for the level was to gain 10 places to stay in the race. Why does a race exist for people 170-180th and not include the racers above those levels.

        As for that snow level, seeing that avalanche and boulder that hits the right side of the road, I crash… so I use the rewind feature where I see the exact same animation and boulder hit in the same spot.

        I’m the opposite, a story is one of the worst things that a racing game needs and don’t get me started on the on-foot gameplay they are adding this year.

      • Game is really awesome, folks this is made by black box (original developers of NFS) and I’ve tried the demo and can proudly report it is FANTASTIC!!! Definitely should buy 😀
        See ya’ll online 😛

  • ohhhhhhhhhhh maaaaaaaaaan
    my hyper combo fingers be twitching!
    got my pre-order in, i’m ready!

  • Do I need to have played Ass Creed 2 and Brotherhood to enjoy the next game? I dropped out of the series after part 1 because it was incredibly boring, but I’ve been convinced the sequels are worth a look-in.

    Also – my wallet is safe. Skyrim is good enough to make me not give a crap about anything else being released this year. It would only take me away from Skyrim.

    • Yes. Very much. It’s like jumping into Return of the Jedi and going ‘Han who? Ah well Wikipedia will fill me in on all the character depth, story and intrigue surely…” No it won’t. You really are missing two AMAZING games. AC was half a game/half a tech demo. AC2 fixed everything that was wrong with it.

      • I really only play those games for the meta-game of upgrading the cities.
        The timed platforming bits really, really ruin it for me.

        I just end up jumping into walls, or off the thing I’m aiming for.
        I want an option to make it like enslaved… with the ‘no fail’ jumping.

    • There’s a fairly substantial arc running through all the games, so I wouldn’t recommend skipping any. (Assassin’s Creed 2 is my favourite so far anyways, why would you even want to skip it!?!)

      • Yeah, I might grab a copy – follow up question: do I need to finish the first game? Thats a deal breaker for me because I’ve tried twice and just hated it both times.

        • I couldn’t finish AC1 either but my wife did and I watched.

          The true bad guy is actually the master of the Assassins who betrayed the Assassins to the Templars in order to obtain a “Piece of Eden” a MacGuffin that looks like a golden apple and conveys badass powers on the person using it.
          Also the assistant to the dude who is scouring Desmond’s memories is actualy an Assassin too, and she’s there to help you – which she does by busting you out of the facility.

          There, I just saved you the bother of finishing AC1.

          AC2 and Brotherhood are much better made, and generally better written, better directed, etc. They follow Ezio’s story as he discovers his heritage and the massive Assassins vs. Templars conspiracy, and we get a lot more info about what’s happening in the real world where desmond is. AC2 was excellent, and Brotherhood (which people whine that it was just AC2.5) polished AC2’s mechanics and added a bunch more toys, including actually being able to recruit and train up Assassins to undertake missions and also come to your aid in combat.

          AssRev is going to be fricken wild.

          • Not sure the Pieces of Eden can be considered a MacGuffin, since it remains significant throughout the plot and has a an actual function and reason for existing in the story.

            Also *End Spoilers*

          • Thats still a McGuffin. It’s not whether they try and justify it, its just an object on interest that drives the narrative.

        • FWIW (although not worth much cuz it’s now been spoiled) the game ramps up on your ninth assassination which turns out to not be an assassination at all – from there you start unravelling the plot between Al Mualim and the Templars and every section hence is awesome – plus the ending where you’re basically wondering around Abstergo free to look at people’s emails and what not is kind of unsettling.

          As a game though AC2 is miles better – about halfway through that and it has consistently entertained (and more incredibly maintained some real variety in the gameplay)

      • Have they removed the dodgy DRM from #2 yet? I won’t buy it until they do. And therefore can’t play brotherhood or revelations.
        It’s a pity since I liked the first one.

    • it’s always a good sign when every pro player when they first try ultimate immediantly choose phoenix wright, i have a suspicion that he will be top tier!

  • I’ve never understood why people fixate on the beating people up with dildos when discussing Saints row and san Andreas. Sure it’s fun for a few seconds but it gets boring in the long run.

  • Mark, I take strong exception to your description of Saints Row: The Third.

    I completely understand your context after your recent (pretty awesome) article on GTA 3 vs GTA 4 self-impressions.

    I completely understand that some people have recently jumped on the “I play mature games for mature gamers like myself” bandwagon and dropped a pile of hatereviews on SR3.

    I completely understand reviewers being able to leave personal opinions on games that may not reflected the actual majority view.

    However, this shit has [b]got to stop[/b].

    Please edit your comments, which seem to miss the entire point of the franchise: it’s a game where people can beat other people to death with a giant [b]purple[/b] dildo.


      • Of course! The PURPLE dildo makes it so much more meaningful, and provides a high level commentary of BCE Roman culture and societal norms.

        If it were a green dildo? 6/10!

    • It’s not that I don’t love games that are crazy, it’s as dumb as I don’t like the shooting, handling, feel of Saints Row.

      That’s it man!

      I’m also a fan of skewering games for hardcore people such as myself — I just never got into Saints like other folks.

      • Saint’s Row 1 was clunky and annoying, SR2 was more refined somehow, though I couldn’t tell you exactly what they changed. If you haven’t tried SR2, you really should.

      • Hey man – just a bit of tongue-in-cheek!

        It really was an awesome article, though. I like being able to read about where writers are coming from when they discuss games, I think it really adds to the entire review and their impressions, especially against the old “hardcore love-everything gamer reviews another hardcore game they like” slant that used to be hanging around (not Kotaku, just in general).

        Plus, you just hate purple.

      • You know I had a similar issue with the controls of SR2 it seemed too easy to screw up your aim – the fact that RS and not LT was aiming down sights didn’t help (it may work for Halo but they have some of the tightest RS aiming that I’ve ever seen, it didn’t work for Saints Row)

        Having said that I dig all the nutcase stuff you can do and it looks like they’ve majorly updated their graphics from no 2 (which looked kinda plastic compared to GTAIV)

        I also hear they’re making the campaign shorter which is frankly a good thing – I gave up on SR2’s campaign after the umpteenth time of getting distracted by a gang turf war or killed by the shoddy aim, as it is I’m only 2/3 through GTAIV’s campaign after almost 2 years with the game – I need a shorter game FFS!

        Finally the ability to share your characters online is a brilliant addition – my character in SR2 was basically a dead ringer for Michael Jackson and it made what could sometimes be a grind into goofy fun.

        I note from the “Initiation Station” that one of the beards you can wear is called “Chuck” I look forward to taking Chuck Norris on his tour to clean up Steelport dildo in hand!

  • Wallet already hurt a few months ago on pre-orders. Time to cash in! And my copy of Skyrim still hasn’t arrived yet. Goodbye sweet world, I’ll see you around Christmas… maybe.

  • I’ve been wanting a decent Move game so I can pick up my Move controller again other than let it catch dust & so far, Medieval Moves looks promising. Gonna make some time tonight so I can give the demo a quick whirl.

    Halo: CE a day 1 get while Revelations can wait when it get’s cheaper.

  • Yep – Assassin’s Creed: Revelations & Saints Row : The Third

    Would’ve – LEGO Harry Potter: Years 5-7 (why couldn’t they release all platforms at once this time!?)

    Later On – Halo: CE Anniversary

  • I picked up Skyrim yesterday after playing a rented copy from Blockbuster… this morning I have an email from ozgameshop saying Assassins Creed Revolution has been despatched, am expecting 2 more from them, Saints Row 3 and Lego Harry Potter 5-7, hopefully this week. (Lego HP is for my wife!).

    So many games, so little time! Think I’ll have to take a few days off work to catch up on them all!

  • Great. So that’s Skyrim, Revelations and Saint’s Row 3 which need purchases as well as the recently missed Arkham City. Uhmm, one small problem though…

    No expendable income.


  • AssRev and Saint’s Row for me. Maybe Halo later if people report it retains the magic of the original – if I can’t nostalgia on it, it’s a no buy.

    • lol @ AssRev.

      Same for me. AssRev and Saints Row. Although, this Anno 2070 you speak of intrigues me. Must go do research. To the internets!

    • I got Saints Row 3 for PC because it was only $35,* and I’m only in it “for teh lolz”. I’ve got plenty of other serious games to play so this felt like a good deal for some casual mayhem.

      Downside: I have to wait for the UK release date (18 Nov).

      *Green Man Gaming.

  • You’re not the only one Mark about Halo CE. A few times this year I have gone to dust off some Original Xbox games and replay the campaign of Halo.

    Everytime I got distracted though and never did. This will finally be my excuse and bring to complete for the umpteenth time.

    But I’ll be playing Assassin’s Creed first probably. God that series is amazing.

  • Picking up the “smooth criminal” version of Saints Row, and also preordered Halo from JB, but won’t be playing it for a week or two when my mates are ready for 4-player co-op. Oh man, can’t wait for that…

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