Snacktaku: Mjølner’s God Of War Ragnarök Menu Sent Me To Valhalla

Snacktaku: Mjølner’s God Of War Ragnarök Menu Sent Me To Valhalla

PlayStation Australia and Mjølner have joined forces to create Discover The Realms, a God of War: Ragnarök dining experience in Sydney and Melbourne to celebrate the launch of the GOTY-worthy title. You know what that means… We’re back for another Snacktaku, baby! This bitch is eating, and she ate! The bitch is me, and also David was there too! And our entertainment writer Lauren!

As a lover of meals and an enjoyer of the game, I jumped at the opportunity to experience the nine-course degustation menu representative of the Nine Realms, and that’s precisely what I freakin’ did. Hey, that’s me!

As a word of warning, this is not a nine-course meal that consists of only food (not a bad thing, just a heads up!). The courses consist of two starters (canapés and an entrée), the main course, and a dessert, as well as five different cocktails. Four foods, five drinks, that’s nine courses.

Image: Kotaku Australia

If you’re a non-drinker like me, let the wait staff know and you’ll be served some delicious non-alcoholic options that hit the spot in the same way. Considering I’m not a drink connoisseur, I’ll be going over the edible meals rather than the drinkable meals here. I mean, I wouldn’t call myself a food connoisseur either, but if you refer back to the first paragraph, you’ll know a bitch loves to eat. Here’s my experience of Mjølner’s God of War: Ragnarök feast.

Canapé: Surtr’s Rage

Image: Kotaku Australia

Salmon pastrami | Black garlic emulsion | Burnt thyme | Rye cracker

This nipper right here is truly the embodiment of Tiny But Mighty. A noble bar wench handed me one of these just before the God of War: Ragnarok presentation, and at that point, I was starving. I made a point to not eat anything beforehand because I heard ‘nine-course meal’ and I thought, “Oh awesome, today is the day I fucking die by meat.”

I popped this little sucker in my hog gob and felt like Remy the Rat when he eats a strawberry with some cheese. Fireworks and jazz music were rattling through my brain. This little guy was absolutely delicious. I’m usually not the type to go for pastrami or sashimi-type situations, but I was in heaven here. Or uh, Valhalla. Eh? EH? Very good.

Entrée: Freya’s Revenge

mjolner god of war
Image: Kotaku Australia

Roasted bone marrow | XO scallop | Fermented mushroom | Toasted rye sourdough

Alright, so full transparency, at this point I realised that I had made plans with my friend Scott to get lunch, completely forgetting that I had this event. If you’re looking to use your phone in Mjølner, think again because this place is a bunker. I saw an old message from Scott and freaked out, ran out of the venue, had to restart my phone to get it working again, and eventually got back to him to apologise profusely. All was well, plans were postponed, and I was safe to eat my entrée.

Upon arriving back downstairs, there it was. A big fucking bone full of marrow and fermented mushrooms with two scallops on top and some toasted sourdough. Now once again, bone marrow is another thing I normally don’t eat. However, I don’t come to scenarios like this to simply turn my nose up and ask for Alphabet Spaghetti instead. I came to eat and I did, and this shit was ridiculous. So delicious. I highly recommend scooping everything out of the bone and eating it off the toast. It’s a treat.

Main: Secrets of the Father

mjolner god of war
Image: Kotaku Australia

Dry aged scotch fillet | Bottarga sauce | Pickled onion | Charred garlic flowers | Baby potato | Horseradish sour cream | Dill brussel sprouts | Chestnut cream | Crushed hazelnuts

So I’m iron deficient. I’m convinced it’s because I’m one of the girlies, but maybe the divine creator just took one look at me and thought, “Why don’t I make life just a little bit tiring for you? As a funny joke for me?”. Due to being iron deficient, I take my supplements that make shitting a tireless journey akin to God of War: Ragnarok and I live my stupid little life. I also try to eat iron-rich foods, and this main course was so rich in iron that I think it cured me.

There’s a lot going on with this main course so I’m going to break it down and start with the scotch fillet. Oh, man. Oh, boy. Oh *Kratos voice*, BOY. This scotch fillet was perfect. My mouth was watering when I saw it, and then I ate it and blacked out. Suddenly, I was in a golden dream-like state where a prophecy of my life was presented in front of me. I saw myself, sitting next to my sweet editor David, enjoying a delicious meal and having a really great time. I also ate a whole bunch of green onions, which complemented the meat so well.

Then there were the potatoes, and I have to say that these potatoes almost knocked me out with how good they were. Potatoes are one of those things where it’s hard to do them wrong, and on that day they were done so, so right. The cream with the potato made for an almost orgasmic experience, but let’s remember that it’s still No Nut November, so that was NOT happening.

Not pictured above were the dill brussel sprouts, and I am so incredibly sorry that they’re not. The reason why I’m so apologetic is that I was hooting and hollering for those brussel sprouts. I’ve always felt like early childhood media was on a rampage with anti-brussel sprouts propaganda, and I’m here to tell you that these brussel sprouts will make all of that brainwashing go away in an instant. They were so good that I didn’t get a photo, I just ate them. I’m sorry, but I am also not sorry.

Dessert: Highway to Hel

mjolner god of war
Image: Leah Williams

Banana pudding | Vanilla parfait | Brandy butterscotch | Caramelised banana | Puffer quinoa

Another note for transparency here: David, Lauren and I had to quickly rush out of the venue for an office showcase and were under the impression that we would not be able to have the delectable dessert at the end of the event. We were all heartbroken, but I wasn’t going to take this. I wanted to ride the Highway to Hel.

Thankfully, the lovely folks over at PlayStation understood our desires and put out dessert in takeaway boxes. The pictures from the box didn’t do the treat justice, so our beautiful mate from GamesHub (and Kotaku Australia alumnus) Leah Williams sent me the above picture to really show you how good it looked. Look at that. Wow.

Not only does it look good, but it tasted even better. I’m a sucker for a banana dessert, and the bananas and the vanilla are a perfect marriage. You may see ‘quinoa’ and be a little confused, but it worked. Just trust me. This dessert was the final nail in the coffin for me, as I was officially dead. I died a Viking’s death, and I will be sent to Valhalla. When I’m gone, remember me as I was: a lovable dumbass with a heart of gold.

If you’d like to experience Mjølner’s God of War: Ragnarök feast for yourself, make sure to book in now at the restaurant’s website as bookings are essential. The God of War menu will be available at both the Sydney and Melbourne restaurants until Sunday, November 20th, so get a booking quick if you’re looking for a godly time.

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