Don't Have Kids, Part 3

Image: Kotaku

I have two kids. Kids who keep breaking my shit, so it's nice to get some solidarity from the good women of Horizon: Zero Dawn.

The words are slightly different, but the message is the same: don't have kids.

Image: Kotaku

Look at her face. Look at her struggle. She understands me. She gets me.

Don't Have Kids


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It's funny, I was thinking about the whole "don't have kids" thing in the wake of the Nintendo Switch. Everyone was having a right old laugh talking about Nintendo's choice to make Switch cartridges taste like shit. Personally, I was rejoicing. My one-year-old is constantly trying to eat 3DS cartridges. The four-year-old leaves them lying around, the one-year-old tries to eat them. This is the way of things.

Don't Have Kids

So for the last two weeks, my PlayStation 4 hasn't been working.

To be more precise, it was refusing to play discs.

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Switch cartridges tasting like shit is the best thing that ever happened.

Anyway, I'm rambling.

Don't have kids.


    Your copy of splatoon 2 will probably survive the first wave of attack, but children are insidious, inventive creatures with far too much free time.

    It's a matter of when.

    *was not planning to have kids*

    *underlines entry #2 in life plans stating 'NO KIDS'*

    *continues to enjoy not having children, and subsequently having time, money, and freedom*

      Minus the joy you have seeing your beautiful child grow up, learning new things and just witnessing the best thing you can experience in life. But then again it isn't for everyone sadly.

        Sad why? Because I don't share your point of view that'sit's the most wonderful thing ever and will complete me ways I can only imagine as a human being? Nah. I'm happy watching my cats see who can fit whose head in their mouth.

          Same. Absolutely no desire to bring more humans into this world. I don't begrude any that want to, but I would be a horrible, selfish and resentful father.

          Last edited 09/03/17 12:26 pm

          Agreed like I said just an opinion of mine and like I also stated that not alot of others will share, until they have a child of their own. PS I think cats are easier to manage then kids lol.

        I'm glad it isn't for everyone. We pay enough tax to supplement them as it is.

          Consider it an investment - their tax dollars will keep the country going and support you when you are retired and in your twilight years.

            As half of Australians pay zero net tax, I highly doubt it. They will have kids they can't afford and the tax taken from my super and investments will continue to fund then.

    I was going to say that you need to set up some kind of safety cage to keep your consoles, games, tv etc safe from your kids but I think it'd be more cost effective to just cage the kids themselves.

      You realize Mark is a rock climber? Those kids have climbing embedded in their genetic code.

    well, considering how the kids in Horizon look like adult faces stuck on kids bodies... i also wouldn't want to have a kid in that world.

    done have kids...

    and you can have a massive server rack in your house coz you can afford it!

    My daughter is almost 7 now and at the age where I can enjoy playing games with her, and she enjoys playing games with me.

    Stupid us though, we decided to have another one! We are only halfway through the pregnancy and then we get to go through it all over again. Must be careful with my games.

      Congratulations. That is a fair age gap but so nice when you can play games with you kids

    In the beginning, I tucked my games away from my kids so they couldn't be destroyed. Then as they got older I let them play, mostly the Wii at first. Gradually, they figuratively pried the controllers from my hands and took over. I'm lucky if I get to play more than 3 nights a week now, but I make it count when I do. And multiplayer with them is always fun.

    Yeah I am working on my very own Battlefield squad... just need a couple more to fill up the last spaces.

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