Dwarfs never even show up in this game, but sure, ok.
Shadow of War’s huge orc variety is one of the most impressive things about the game. In my dozens and dozens of hours of playtime, I’m still finding orc types I’ve never seen before, and many of them have interesting, hilarious, and uncomfortable things to say.
Below you will find some of my best orc encounters in Shadow of War, whether they made me laugh or almost made me want to barf. Make sure to expand the pictures so you can read the captions clearly.
The drunk
![25 Of The Funniest (And Horniest) Shadow Of War Orcs](https://www.kotaku.com.au/wp-content/uploads/2017/10/13/qhfndzam4nwh9wqz67ck.png?quality=75?quality=75)
The intellectual
![25 Of The Funniest (And Horniest) Shadow Of War Orcs](https://www.kotaku.com.au/wp-content/uploads/2017/10/13/w9lez1qteheufz2xheaw.jpg?quality=75?quality=75)
The smart arses
![25 Of The Funniest (And Horniest) Shadow Of War Orcs](https://www.kotaku.com.au/wp-content/uploads/2017/10/13/ouigaxnyyisendajrekl.jpg?quality=75?quality=75)
![25 Of The Funniest (And Horniest) Shadow Of War Orcs](https://www.kotaku.com.au/wp-content/uploads/2017/10/13/agioakbp3zlqf7raltso.jpg?quality=75?quality=75)
Yes, that is an orc hype man.
The bards
![25 Of The Funniest (And Horniest) Shadow Of War Orcs](https://www.kotaku.com.au/wp-content/uploads/2017/10/13/cmiaw0okeafgminvmyvv.jpg?quality=75?quality=75)
The one with a painful haircut
I don’t want to know how this look happened.
Homoerotic orcs
![25 Of The Funniest (And Horniest) Shadow Of War Orcs](https://www.kotaku.com.au/wp-content/uploads/2017/10/13/ch7paep0idxyl4jxvruj.jpg?quality=75?quality=75)
![25 Of The Funniest (And Horniest) Shadow Of War Orcs](https://www.kotaku.com.au/wp-content/uploads/2017/10/13/tyu45kc09jrpdmigoglj.jpg?quality=75?quality=75)
![25 Of The Funniest (And Horniest) Shadow Of War Orcs](https://www.kotaku.com.au/wp-content/uploads/2017/10/13/evlpvwimmdeingtgbp4z.jpg?quality=75?quality=75)
![25 Of The Funniest (And Horniest) Shadow Of War Orcs](https://www.kotaku.com.au/wp-content/uploads/2017/10/13/s6icjcdsyiwlpxaxclvj.jpg?quality=75?quality=75)
Of course this fucking orc’s name is Dush. OF COURSE IT IS.
Note that this is the biggest section on this compilation. I jokingly called this an orc dating sim in my review for a reason.
The nice one
![25 Of The Funniest (And Horniest) Shadow Of War Orcs](https://www.kotaku.com.au/wp-content/uploads/2017/10/13/lywhjgeuiupsv4ongvza.jpg?quality=75?quality=75)
The extremely relatable one
![25 Of The Funniest (And Horniest) Shadow Of War Orcs](https://www.kotaku.com.au/wp-content/uploads/2017/10/13/lqtfstdcntphiksxbsii.jpg?quality=75?quality=75)
The gross ones
![25 Of The Funniest (And Horniest) Shadow Of War Orcs](https://www.kotaku.com.au/wp-content/uploads/2017/10/13/lqdba2q6expglf7euzdb.jpg?quality=75?quality=75)
![25 Of The Funniest (And Horniest) Shadow Of War Orcs](https://www.kotaku.com.au/wp-content/uploads/2017/10/13/wj4r9oswpmjn1k0bkkws.jpg?quality=75?quality=75)
![25 Of The Funniest (And Horniest) Shadow Of War Orcs](https://www.kotaku.com.au/wp-content/uploads/2017/10/13/fnbr5pvg8fsbqw4rffch.jpg?quality=75?quality=75)
Every time I look at one of these orcs, my stomach starts to turn. Why would you do this, Monolith??
As a palette cleanser, please enjoy some more good orcs that I couldn’t really categorise:
![25 Of The Funniest (And Horniest) Shadow Of War Orcs](https://www.kotaku.com.au/wp-content/uploads/2017/10/13/yehjuw1wz8smbhfcipez.jpg?quality=75?quality=75)
![25 Of The Funniest (And Horniest) Shadow Of War Orcs](https://www.kotaku.com.au/wp-content/uploads/2017/10/13/y5vrhael0gmzepqcjzgc.jpg?quality=75?quality=75)
![25 Of The Funniest (And Horniest) Shadow Of War Orcs](https://www.kotaku.com.au/wp-content/uploads/2017/10/13/uhdkjorijfi5hju22b3c.jpg?quality=75?quality=75)
![25 Of The Funniest (And Horniest) Shadow Of War Orcs](https://www.kotaku.com.au/wp-content/uploads/2017/10/13/utij84jdodqyxnhro1ke.jpg?quality=75?quality=75)
![25 Of The Funniest (And Horniest) Shadow Of War Orcs](https://www.kotaku.com.au/wp-content/uploads/2017/10/13/sg9wcb5jd7ao0z5khs2k.jpg?quality=75?quality=75)
Finally, I took a bunch of screenshots of a moaning orc that appeared in my game, but this compilation by IAmPattyJack gives you the best sense of why this type orc is so noteworthy:
(In my game, moaners were fully capable of talking — they just also liked to make weird sounds at you.)
What kinds of orcs have you encountered while playing Shadow of War? Make sure to share your stories and screenshots in the comments.
Comments
11 responses to “25 Of The Funniest (And Horniest) Shadow Of War Orcs”
LOLOLOL
Douche the obsessed and flog the moaner.
great writing monolith, well done.
i loved all these encounters in shadow of mordor. gonna have to wait for bargain bin prices before i get shadow of war though.
It’s been a while since I’ve played a Pokemon game, this will do.
I want some orc friends!
Looks ace. Looking forward to jumping in 🙂
At least 4 of the Critical Role cast voice acted for this game and they are always gold.
I swear it generates some of the orcs in response to your actions. I killed one captain, with none around, by lopping off his arms and a leg, and immediately as soon as I did that, I was ambushed by ‘Zukrog the Amputator’ (who had crude, metal prosthetic limbs, himself), who was sashaying over and lisping that I’d just done ‘lovely work’, but had a lot to learn, and he looked forward to teaching me.
are you sure it wasn’t the same captain? in the previous one if you killed a captain by burning sometimes they’d show up and have survived and now be all burnt
This guy was a different skin colour/voice/everything and popped up literally the second I finished lopping the limbs off the other captain. Seemingly in response to my act of amputation.
It was like… the second captain I’d killed all-game. You get ambushed in response to things a lot, now. Usually it’s when you kill a captain’s blood brother, but there seem to be other triggers.
Nah…. it works with tge rngesus of the game..
Same thing happened to jim sterlings early impressions vid. He poisoned a barrel and waited a while in cover in a bush hoping it would poison a bunch of orcs… when noghing happened and he walked out of the bush he got ambushed by an orc poisoner who gavenhim lip about “not having enough poison!” was quite funny
It should have the same mechanic as the first one. If you didn’t decapitate the captain, they usually come back with whatever injury you did to him before.
Enh, it’s a little iffy on that, but kinda similar. Probably my favourite captain at the moment is a guy who seems to pop up every half hour or so, no matter how I’ve killed him. It hasn’t actually LET me do a decapitation yet, and I have no idea how to force it (various executions have usually just chopped off limbs, which isn’t being reflected in his subsequent appearances). He’s called ‘Whastsisface The Ancient’, and every time we meet he makes poetic speeches about how the pair of us are bound to a cycle of death and rebirth. He’s Legendary, and been consistently giving me regular upgrades every level for my sword. 🙂
I started playing Shadow of mordor just before this one came out. I don’t know why i didn’t play it sooner, having such a blast with it. Huge orc battles and I sometimes purposefully die just to see what happens with the Orc army…..(and other times I’m murdered violently and the lucky underling who gets the last shot gets a promotion), BUT that’s not the point! 😛
Can’t wait to pick up Shadow of War