Gamers knew this morning that they were going to get a ton of Mario. Specifically, Super Mario Odyssey.
What they didn’t know they were getting: nipples. Mario nipples.
As the Nintendo Direct continued to play out, it was the image of the iconic plumber, shirtless on the beach that captured everyone’s attention.
Explore the frozen fields of Shiveria in the Snow Kingdom & the sunny shores of Bubblaine in the Seaside Kingdom in #SuperMarioOdyssey! pic.twitter.com/p8AsDqBbTj
— Nintendo of America (@NintendoAmerica) September 13, 2017
Of course, everyone fixated on the nipples.
Great, now I know what Mario's nipples look like. pic.twitter.com/OnZhmL7hNR
— Mark Serrels (@Serrels) September 13, 2017
do u think mario's nipple textures are as hi-res as his pores and mustache
— OLI BÄR (@OliverMatroskin) September 13, 2017
— Angharad Yeo (@angharadyeo) September 13, 2017
The beach photo also raised questions as to whether still officially has a tattoo, one of the last times Mario showed some skin:
You mean It's not canon anymore ??!? pic.twitter.com/2hO1nrKBEa
— ♄ (@HalviI) September 13, 2017
But for the most part, it was Mario‘s tiny areolas that stole the show.
If I see marios nipples trend on twitter then we're all in for a wild ride
— Vani | LunaNova (@GrandAcademia) September 13, 2017
*mario squirts his nipple milk into your coffee* mama Mia!
— ✨Robin (@velourina) September 13, 2017
Nintendo has been weird in 2017. Awesome, for sure, but weird.
2017 is a fucking weird year.
We’ve seen Mario nipples, we know Waluigi is uncircumcised, what’s next?
Peach is Trans
Isn’t Birdo trans?
We know peach has a dildo from mario rpg
Childhood destroyed…
If you mean it’s weird to have that information, sure 🙂 But it’s not weird that he’s uncircumcised, specifically, unless you’re American or Jewish. For the rest of us we would just assume this to be the case.
Definitely the former.
…I think I missed the latter, but also am not sure I want to ask.
A recent (satire) article that has been doing the rounds.
Also, shyguys have no gag reflex.
You’d think Mario would have more chest hair.
He’s no longer a plumber, is he still Italian!?
Yeah, I was a lot more surprised by the complete lack of body hair too, to be honest.
Am I the only one that thinks it would be weird if Mario didn’t have them?
Nope. That would have been far weirder to me too – can only imagine the furore if they’d been omitted.
On the plus side, at least they’re not hairy, but it seems unnatural given his face. Wouldn’t have picked Mario to be one for manscaping.
Well, I imagine the chest hair caused issues when running around in the overalls. Accidental pulled hairs aren’t fun =P
But does he have an anatomically correct butthole?
not sure about Mario, but Peach does….i have seen the video
Asking the real questions here.
Reference to similar Nier Automata meme if you missed that 🙂
43 days get hype!
Why aren’t people questioning the lack of belly button? Does this mean Mario is a clone, and every time you die in game it just produces another Mario clone?
#2deep4me
His shorts look pretty high, perhaps it’s just covered up?
Looks to be the case
I really don’t get what the big deal is. If he didn’t have nipples, people would probably freak out more… What did people expect? I don’t get what makes gaming ‘news’ anymore.