Announcing The Winners Of Our Diablo IV Early Access Beta Giveaway (And The Funniest Answers)

Folks, our Diablo IV early access beta code giveaway has now come to a close, and it’s time to announce the winners.

Drumroll, please!

The Winners

Tyler Lowe! David Tipping! Joshua Leslie! Cameron Rooney! Craig Waiting! Come on down and receive your codes, mates. Truly fantastic responses from all five of you. Check your emails as soon as you are able, and you will find your Battle.net codes ready and waiting.

Let’s take a look at the winning answers, shall we?

Tyler Lowe

I would be Diablo so I could run that shit. Diablo was the youngest of the Prime Evils, but I found him the most dangerous, for his power over terror left him incapable of feeling fear. Though he had easily possessed and corrupted many humans, Diablo’s essence was finally trapped in a soulstone and banished to the unfathomable Abyss twenty years ago.

Canonical. Considered. I approve. Winner.

David Tipping

I would have to be The Cow King, mooing my way to the domination of Sanctuary at the head of my herd of blood thirsty, methane infused bovines.

Based and moo-pilled. Winner.

Joshua Leslie

I would be a fetish from Kurast, cruising the swamp with my knife and blowdart. I ain’t serving no Witch Doctor though. Me and my homies live the full goblin mode life, mixing poisons, breathing fire, dancing around and shiz.

Ruby Innes approved lifestyle. Winner.

Cameron Rooney

A unicorn covered in blood, prancing about have the best time, dropping that rare loot and sprinkling rainbows everywhere. After the response to the visual style of Diablo 3 I figured gamers would want to kill anything that resembles happiness.

Minor roasting of Diablo 3. Winner.

Craig Waiting

A fallen one, I would run around like a little coward poking the hero and running away chuckling, while enjoying my time as a demon before I am slain at any point. Be a mischievous little adventure.

Knows what they’re about. Winner.

Thank you to these fine, fine folks for their very good answers, and thank you to everyone (holy cats, there were SO MANY of you) that entered our competition. To show you all some love, and to celebrate the creativity the Kotaku Australia community generates, I thought I’d post a few our favourite runners-up below.

The Runners-Up

A treasure Goblin. Who wouldn’t want a little portal? – Anthony Massingham, QLD

I’d opt for the lonely but peaceful existence of a skeleton in a barrel. The solemn duty of dying a pointless death always looming large while I ponder the folly of the choices that led me to this cursed predicament! – Tom Bligh, QLD

none game looks like poo – Marcus John, Portugal (I can’t lie, I laughed)

I’d be Rakanishu, screaming my name while rushing heroes to my untimely death. – Brandon Costanzo, VIC

A Mighty holy Monk, so i can sit and drink beers and watch everyone else struggle with the minions of hell and giggle at the irony of the situation. – Kristie Tedford, QLD

an imp so i can imp – Jahkwon Husbands, Canada

A ghoul, no one suspects a lowly ghoul – Venice Valmore, WA (Big brain plays)

1 of them goblins that lurks in the dark, you think XQC looks like a night dwelling goblin you havnt seen me yet – Ben Crowdy, WA

i would be a goblin (not loot goblin) because you think asmongold is a degen you should see me – Kallum Cooper, VIC

A chicken because nobody would bother me – Aidan Gurley, United States (another big brain play)

Let’s be honest. Basic zombie. It’s not flash work but it’s honest. After all if the hero couldn’t train on us then how would they beat the villain. – James Frost, NSW

A cow because cows with polearms are BiS look at them, you cant argue. – Jeanie Badenhorst, VIC (Its true, I can’t argue)

Short of stature, generous of heart, a little bit mischievous and could do with a wash, I would be a Treasure Goblin- dying to share bountiful booty with anyone who will stay a while and listen. – Erika Lee, VIC

As he is all three creature, demon and entity id probably be Bobby Kotick. Let his evil business practices reign supreme. – Alice Smith, QLD

A Horse – Jerome Thiel (Fair enough)

With out a doubt I’d be a crow, they have been the unsung mascot of every Diablo game, mark my words, they will have their moment to shine! – David McAndrew, NSW

Probably Wirt, dead very early – Daniel Machuca, VIC

Goatman, because I am a man, I have a goatee, and I eat my mum’s laundry. – Grant Dobson, VIC

Wirt’s missing leg. The one with the GOOD shoe on it. – Ryan Sumners, NSW